
saiMlWfca?: 


mrnmmmsmmwm 



^»SiU\r: a 













a™ PZ-S 

Book -T ) <o<b£> 

Ae. 


GopightN?. 


5 


C- q p v 2T 

cdexright deposit 











)t Eakkit actually took 
a toatcij out of tto pocket. 


See Page i 


I 








I 


Alice’s Adventures 


W5~L 

nst* 


in Wonderland 


BY 

LEWIS CARROLL \ 

Author of 

“ Through the Looking-Olass and What Alice Found There ” 

Illustrated by 

BESSIE PEASE GUTMANN 





New York 


DODGE PUBLISHING COMPANY 

220 East 23d Street 









LIBRARY of CONGRESS 

Two Copies Received 

SEP. ? .1907 

^ CopyriffM Entry 

S -ef /(> /f*7 

CLA ^ nL * )lXc ’ "O' 

/Sgo 7r 

COPY A. 


Copyright, 1907, by 
DODGE PUBLISHING CO. 


7 - 22471 



INTRODUCTION 


All in the golden afternoon 
Full leisurely we glide; 

For both our oars, with little skill, 

By little arms are plied, 

While little hands make vain pretence 
Our wanderings to guide. 


Ah, cruel Three ! In such an hour. 

Beneath such dreamy weather, 
To beg a tale of breath too weak 
To stir the tiniest feather ! 

Yet what can one poor voice avail 
Against three tongues together? 


Imperious Prima flashes forth 
Her edict to "begin it” — 

In gentler tones Secunda hopes 
"There will be nonsense in it” 
While Tertia interrupts the tale 
Not more than once a minute. 


Anon, to sudden silence won, 

In fancy they pursue 
The dream-child moving through a land 
Of wonders wild and new, 

In friendly chat with bird or beast — 
And half believe it true. 



INTRODUCTION 


And ever as the story drained 
The wells of fancy dry, 

And faintly strove that weary one 
To put the subject by, 

The rest Next time — ” “jt is next time 
The happy voices cry. 


Thus grew the tale of Wonderland : 

Thus slowly, one by one, 

Its quaint events were hammered out 
And now the tale is done, 

And home we steer, a merry crew, 
Beneath the setting sun. 


Alice, a childish story take. 

And with a gentle hand 
Lay it where childhood’s dreams are twined 
In memory’s mystic band, 

Like pilgrim’s withered wreath of flowers 
Plucked in a far-off land. 





ALICE’S ADVENTURES 
IN WONDERLAND 


DOWN THE RABBIT-HOLE. 


A LICE was beginning to get very tired 
of sitting by her sister on the bank, 
and of having nothing to do ; once or 
twice she had peeped into the book her sister j 
was reading, but it had no pictures or conversa- 
tions in it, “and what is the use of a book,” 
thought Alice, “without pictures or conversa- 
tions?” 

So she was considering in her own mind ( as 
well as she could, for the hot day made her feel 
very sleepy and stupid), whether the pleasure/ 
of making a daisy-chain would be worth the' 
trouble of getting up and picking the daisies, 
when suddenly a white rabbit with pink eyes 
ran close by her. 

There was nothing so very remarkable in 
that; nor did Alice think it so very much out 
of the way to hear the Rabbit say to itself, “Oh 
dear! Oh dear! I shall be too late!” (When 



ALICES ADVENTURES 



she thought it over afterward, it occured to 
her that she ought to have wondered at this, 
but at the time it all seemed quite natural) ; 
but when the Rabbit actually took a watch out 
of its waistcoat-pocket , and looked at it, and 
then hurried on, Alice started to her feet, for 
it flashed across her mind that she had never 
before seen a Rabbit with either a waistcoat- 
pocket or a watch to take out of it, and, burn- 
ing with curiousity she ran across the field 
after it, and was just in time to see it pop down 
a large rabbit-hole under the hedge. 

In another moment down went Alice after 
it, never once considering how in the world 
she was to get out again. 

The rabbit-hole went straight on like a tun- 
nel for some way, and then dipped suddenly*' 
down, so suddenly that Alice had not a mo- 
ment to think about stopping herself before 
she found herself falling down what seemed 
to be a very deep well. 

Either the well was very deep, or she fell 
very slowly, for she had plentv of time as she 
[ 2 ] 






IN WONDERLAND 


Lk 


went down to look about her, and to wonder 
what was going to happen next. First, she 
tried to look down and make out what she was 
coming to, but it was too dark to see anything ; 
then she looked at the sides of the well, and 
noticed that they were filled with cupboards 
and bookshelves : here and there she saw maps 
and pictures hung upon pegs. She took down 
a jar from one of the shelves as she passed; 
it was labelled “ORANGE MARMA- 
LADE,” but to her great disappointment it 
was empty; she did not like to drop the jar 
for fear of killing somebody underneath, so 
managed to put it into one of the cupboards 
as she fell past it. 

“Well,” thought Alice to herself, “after such 
a fall as this, I shall think nothing of tumbling 
down stairs. How brave they’ll all think me 
at home! Why, I wouldn’t say anything 
about it, even if I fell off the top of the house.” 
(Which was very likely true.) 

Down, down, down. Would the fall never 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


I’ve fallen by this time?” she said aloud. “I 
must be getting somewhere near the centre of I 
the earth. Let me see: that would be four 
ithousand miles down, I think” (for, you see, 
Alice had learned several things of this sort 
in her lessons in the schoolroom, and though 
this was not a very good opportunity for show- 
ing off her knowledge, as there was no one to 
listen to her, still it was good practice to say 
it over) “yes, that’s about the right distance — 
but then I wonder what latitude or longitude 
I’ve got to?” (Alice had not the slightest idea 
what latitude was or longitude either, but she 
thought they were nice grand words to say.) 

Presently she began again. “I wonder if 
I shall fall right through the earth! How fun- 
ny it’ll seem to come out among the people 
that walk with their heads downward! The* 
Antipathies, I think” (she was rather glad 
v there was no one listening this time, as it didn’t 
f sound at all the right word), “but I shall have 
'to ask them what the name of the country is, 
you know. Please ma’am, is this New Zea- 


< 




land or Australia?’’ (and she tried to courtesy 
as she spoke — fancy courtesying as you’re fall- 
ing through the air! Do you think you could 
manage it?) “And what an ignorant little 
girl she’ll think me for asking! No, it’ll never 
do to ask: perhaps I shall see it written up 
somewhere.” 

Down, down, down. There was nothing 
else to do, so Alice soon began talking again. 
“Dinah’ll miss me very much to-night, I should 
think!” (Dinah was the cat.) “I hope they’ll 
remember her saucer of milk at tea-time. 
Dinah, my dear! I wish you were down here 
with me. There are no mice in the air, I’m 
afraid, but you might catch a bat, and that’s 
very like a mouse you know. But do cats eat 
bats, I wonder?” And here Alice began to 
get rather sleepy, and went on saying to her- 
self, in a dreamy sort of way, “Do cats eat 
bats? Do cats eat bats?” and sometimes, “Do 
bats eat cats?” for, you see, as she couldn’t an- 
swer either question, it didn’t much matter 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


dozing off, and had just begun to dream that 
she was walking hand in hand with Dirjah, and 
was saying to her very earnestly, “Now Dinah, 
tell me the truth: did you ever eat a bat?” when 
suddenly, thump ! thump ! down she came upon 
a heap of sticks and dry leaves, and the fall 
was over. 

Alice was not a bit hurt, and she jumped up 
on to her feet in a moment : she looked up, but 
it was all dark overhead; before her was an- 
other long passage, and the white rabbit was 
still in sight, hurrying down it. There was 
not a moment to be lost : away went Alice like 
the wind, and was just in time to hear it say, 
as it turned a corner, “Oh, my ears and whis- 
kers, how late’s it’s growing!” She was close 
behind it when she turned the corner, but the 
Rabbit was no longer to be seen: she founds 
herself in a long, low hall, which was lit up 
by a row of lamps hanging from the roof. 

There were doors all round the hall, but they 
were all locked, and when Alice had been all 
the way down one side and up the other, trying 



IN WONDERLAND 




wild beasts, and other unpleasant things, all 
because they would not remember the simple 
rules their friends had taught them, such as, 
that a red-hot poker will burn you if you hold 
it too long; and that if you cut your finger 
very deeply with a knife, it usually bleeds; and 
she had never forgotten that, if you drink much 
from a bottle marked “poison,” it is almost 
certain to disagree with you, sooner or later. 

However, this bottle was not marked 
“poison,” so Alice ventured to taste it, and 
finding it very nice (it had, in fact, a sort of 
mixed flavor of cherry tart, custard, pineapple, 
roast turkey, toffy, and hot buttered toast), 
she very soon finished it off 

***** 

* * * * 
***** 

“What a curious feeling!” said Alice, “I 
must be shutting up like a telescope.” 

And so it was indeed ; she was now only ten 
inches high, and her face brightened up at the 
thought that she was now the right size for 
[ 9 ] 


ALICES ADVENTURES 




going through the little door into that lovely 
garden. First, however, she waited for a few 
minutes to see if she was going to shrink any 
further; she felt a little nervous about this, 
“for it might end, you know,” said Alice to 
herself, “in my going out altogether, like a 
candle. I wonder what I should be like then?” 
And she tried to fancy what the flame of a 
candle looks like after the candle is blown out, 
for she could not remember ever having seen 
such a thing. 

After a while, finding that nothing more 
happened, she decided on going into the gar- 
den at once, but, alas for poor Alice ! when she 
got to the door, she found she had forgotten 
the little golden key, and when she went back 
to the table for it, she found she could not pos - 1 
sibly reach it; she could see it quite plainly 
through the glass, and she tried her best to 
climb up one of the legs of the table, but it 
as too slippery, and when she had tired her- 
ielf out with trying, the poor little thing sat 
down and cried. 

[ 10 ] 



> 


% 






“Come, there’s no use in crying like that!” 
said Alice to herself, rather sharply; “I ad- 
vise you to leave off this minute!” She gen- 
erally gave herself very good advice (though 
she very seldom followed it), and sometimes 
she scolded herself so severely as to bring tears 
into her eyes, and once she remembered trying 
to box her own ears for having cheated herself 
in a game of croquet she was playing against 
herself, for this curious child was very fond 
of pretending to be two people. “But it’s 
no use now,” thought poor Alice, “to pre- 
tend to be two people! Why, there’s hardly 
enough of me left to make one respectable 
person!” 

Soon her eye fell on a little glass box that 
was lying under the table; she opened it, and 
bund in it a very small cake, on which the 
words “EAT ME” were beautifully marked 
in currants. “Well, I’ll eat it,” said Alice, 
“and if it makes me grow larger, I can reach 
the key; and if it makes me grow smaller, I 
can creep under the door; so either way, I’ll 

[ii] 



«) 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


get into the garden, and I don’t care which 
happens.” 

She ate a little bit, and said anxiously to 
herself “Which way? Which way?” holding 
her hand on the top of her head to feel which 
way it was growing, and she was quite sur- 
prised to find that she remained the same size; 
to be sure, this is what generally happens when 
one eats cake, but Alice had got so much in 
the way of expecting nothing but out-of-the- 
way things to happen, that it seemed quite dull 
and stupid for life to go in the common way. 

So she set to work, and very soon finished 
off the cake. 



IN WONDERLAND 


THE POOL OF TEABS, 


£ £ URIOUSER and curiouser,” cried 

B Alice (she was so much surprised 

that for the moment she quite 
forgot how to speak good English) ; “now 
I’m opening out like the largest tele- 
scope that ever was! Good-by, feet” (for 
when she looked down at her feet, they seemed 
to be almost out of sight they were getting so 
far off). “Oh my poor little feet, I wonder 
who will put on your shoes and stockings for 1 
you now, dears ? I’m sure I shan’t be able! I 
( shall be a great deal too far off to trouble my- 
self about you : you must manage the best way 
you can; but I must be kind to them,” thought 
Alice, “or perhaps they won’t walk the way I 
want to go! Let me see: I’ll give them a 
new pair of boots every Christmas.” 

And she went on planning to herself how 
[ 13 ] 



i ^ IV 

ImIJ 


ALICES ADVENTURES 



she would manage it. “They must go by the 
carrier,” she thought; “and how funny it’ll 
seem, sending presents to one’s own feet. And 
how odd the directions will lookl 

Alice's Right Foot, Esq. 

Hearthrug, 

Near the Fender, 

{with Alice's love.) 


“Oh dear, what nonsense I’m talking.” 

Just at this moment her head struck against 
the roof of the hall; in fact she was now rather 
more than nine feet high, and she at once took 
up the little golden key and hurried off to 
the garden door. 

Poor Alice! It was as much as she could'*' 
do, lying down on one side, to look through 
into the garden with one eye: but to get 
through was more hopeless than ever: she sat 
down and began to cry again. 

“You ought to be ashamed of yourself,” said 
Alice, “a great girl like you” (she might well 
[ 14 ] 







IN WONDERLAND 


say this), “to go on crying in this way! Stop 
this moment, I tell you!” But she went on 
all the same, shedding gallons of tears, until 
there was a large pool all around her, about 
four inches deep and reaching half down the 
hall. 

After a time she heard a little pattering of 
feet in the distance, and she hastily dried her 
eyes to see what was coming. It was the 
White Rabbit returning, splendidly dressed, 
with a pair of white kid gloves in one hand 
and a large fan in the other: he came trotting 
along in a great hurry, muttering to himself 
as he came, “Oh! the Duchess, the Duchess! 
Oh ! won’t she be savage if I’ve kept her wait- 
ing?” Alice felt so desperate that she was 
ready to ask help of any one; so, when the 
Rabbit came near her, she began, in a low, 
If you please, sir ” The 


timid voice, 

Rabbit started violently, dropped the white 
kid gloves and the fan, and skurried away into 
the darkness as hard as he could go. 

Alice took up the fan and gloves, and, as 




fA 


ALICE3 ADVENTURES 


the hall was very hot, she kept fanning herself 
all the time she went on talking. “Dear, dear!* 
How queer everybody is to-day ! And yester * i 
day things went on just as usual. I wonder 
if I’ve been changed in the night? Let me 
think : was I the same when I got up this morn- 
ing? I almost think I can remember feeling 
a little different. But if I’m not the same, the 
next question is, who in the world am I ? Ah ' 
that's the great puzzle!” And she began think- 
ing over all the children she knew, that were 
of the same age as herself, to see if she could 
have been changed for any of them. 

“I’m sure I’m not Ada,” she said, “for her 
hair goes in such long ringlets, and mine 
does’nt go in ringlets at all; and I’m sure 
can’t be Mabel, for I know all sorts of things)' 
and she, oh! she knows such a very little! Be^ 
sides, she's she, and I'm I, and — oh dear, how 
puzzling it all is! I’ll try if I know all the 
things I used to know. Let me see : four times 
five is twelve, and four times six is thirteen, 
and four times seven is — oh dear! I shall never 
[ 16 ] 


d 




“I’m sure those are not the right words,” 
said poor Alice, and her eyes filled with tears 
again as she went on, “I must be Mabel after 
all, and I shall have to go and live in that poky 


“How doth the little crocodile 
Improve his shining tail, 

And pours the waters of the Nile 
On every golden scale! 


How cheerfully he seems to grin. 
How neatly spreads his claws. 
And welcomes little fishes in 
With gently smiling jaws! ” 


IM WONDERLAND 


get to twenty at that rate ! However the mul- 
tiplication table don’t signify: let’s try geogra- 
phy. London is the capital of Paris, and 
Paris is the capital of Rome, and Rome — no, 
that's all wrong, I’m certain! I must have 
been changed for Mabel! I’ll try and say 
c How doth the little — — J " and she crossed her 
hands on her lap, as if she were saying lessons, 
and began to repeat it, but her voice sounded 
hoarse and strange, and the words did not 
come the same as they used to do: 





ALICES ADVENTURES 


little house, and have next to no toys to play 
with, and oh! ever so many lessons to learn! 
No I’ve made up my mind about it; if I’m 
Mabel, I’ll stay down here! It’ll be no use 
their putting their heads down and saying, 
‘Come up again, dear!’ I shall only look up 
and say, ‘Who am I, then? Tell me that first, 
and then, if I like being that person, I’ll come 
up; if not, I’ll stay down here till I’m some- 
body else’ — but, oh dear!” cried Alice with a 
sudden burst of tears, “I do wish they would 
put their heads down! I am so very tired of 
being all alone here!” 

As she said this, she looked down at her 
hands, and was surprised to see that she had 
put on one of the Rabbit’s little white kid 
gloves while she was talking. “How can I 
have done that?” she thought. “I must 
growing small again.” She got up and went 
to the table to measure herself by it, and found 
that, as nearly as she could guess, she was now 
two feet high, and was going on shrink- 
ing rapidly; she soon found out that the cause 



IN WONDERLAND 


of this was the fan she was holding, and she 
dropped it hastily, just in time to save her- 
self from shrinking away altogether. 

“That was a narrow escape!” said Alice, a 
good deal frightened at the sudden change, 
but very glad to find herself still in existence; 
“and now for the garden,” and she ran with 
all her speed back to the little door; but alas! 
the little door was shut again, and the little 
golden key was lying on the glass table as be- 
fore, “and things are worse than ever,” thought 
the poor child, “for I never was so small as 
this before, never! And I declare it’s too 
bad, that it is!” 

As she said these words her foot slipped, and 
in another moment, splash! she was up to her 
chin in salt water. Her first idea was that 
%he had somehow fallen into the sea, “and in 
that case I can go back by railway,” she said 
to herself. ( Alice had been at the seaside once 
in her life, and had come to the general con- 
clusion, that wherever you go to on the English 
coast you will find a number of bathing ma- 





ALICES ADVENTURES 


chines in the sea, some children digging in the 
sand with wooden spades, then a row of lodg- j 
in g houses, and behind them a railway station. ) 
However she soon made out that she was in 
the pool of tears which she had wept when she 
was nine feet high. 

“I wish I hadn’t cried so much!” said Alice 
as she swam about, trying to find her way 
out. “I shall be punished for it now, I sup- 
pose, by being drowned in my own tears. That 
mil be a queer thing, to be sure! However, 
everything is queer to-day.” 

Just then she heard something splashing 
about in the pool a little way off, and she swam 
nearer to make out what it was; at first she 
thought it much be a walrus or hippopotamus, 
but then she remembered how small she 1 
was now, and she soon made out that it 
' was only a mouse, that had slipped in like 
( herself. 

“Would it be of any use, now,” thought 
lice, “to speak to this mouse? Everything 
is so out-of-the-way down here, that I should 
[ 20 ] 



< 


A 



think very likely it can talk ; at any rate there’s 
no harm in trying.” So she began; u O Mouse, 
do you know the way out of this pool? I am 
very tired of swimming about here, O Mouse!” 
(Alice thought this must be the right way of 
speaking to a mouse ; she had never done such 
a thing before, but she remembered having 
seen in her brother’s Latin grammar, “A 
mouse — of a mouse — to a mouse — a mouse — O 
mouse!”) The Mouse looked at her rather in- 
quisitively, and seemed to her to wink one of 
its little eyes, but it said nothing. 

‘‘Perhaps it doesn’t understand English,” 
thought Alice; “I daresay it’s a French Mouse, 
come over with William the Conqueror.” (For, 
with all her knowledge of history, Alice had no 
very clear notion how long ago anything had 
happened. ) So she began again : “ Ou est ma 
chatte?” which was the first sentence in her 
French lesson-book. The Mouse gave a sud- 
den leap out of the water, and seemed to quiver 
all over with fright. “Oh I beg your pardon!” 
cried Alice hastily, afraid that she had hurt 


^ sgp T-Tirr^P^ 


|W IM WONDERLAND g 

Inis 




ALICES ADVENTURES 


the poor animars feelings. “I quite forgot 
you didn’t like cats.” 

“Not like cats!” cried the Mouse in a shrill 
passionate voice. “Would you like cats if you 
were me?” 

“Well, perhaps not,” said Alice in a sooth- 
ing tone: “don’t be angry about it. And yet 
I wish I could show you our cat Dinah; I 
think you’d take a fancy to cats if you could 
only see her. She is such a dear quiet thing,” 
Alice went on, half to herself, as she swam 
lazily about in the pool, “and she sits purring 
so nicely by the fire licking her paws and wash- 
ing her face — and she is such a nice soft thing 
to nurse — and she’s a capital one for catching 
mice — oh, I beg your pardon!” cried Alice 
again, for this time the Mouse was bristling 
all over, and she felt certain it must be really 
1 offended. “We won’t talk about her any 
' more if you’d rather not.*’ 

“We; indeed!” cried the Mouse, who was 
frembling down to the end of his tail. “As 
if I would talk on such a subject! Our family 
[ 22 ] 







Ifi WONDERLAND 


always hated cats: nasty, low, vulgar things! 
Don’t let me hear the name again!” 

“I won’t indeed!” said Alice in a great hurry 
to change the subject of conversation. “Are 
you — are you fond — of — of dogs?” The 
Mouse did not answer, so Alice went on eager- 
ly: “There is such a nice little dog near our 
house I should like to show you! A little i 
bright-eyed terrier, you know, with oh! such 
long curly brown hair! And it’ll fetch things 
when you throw them, and it’ll sit up and beg 
for its dinner, and all sorts of things — I can’t 
remember half of them — and it belongs to a 
farmer, you know, and he says it’s so useful, 
it’s w T orth a hundred pounds ! He says it kills/ 
all the rats and — oh dear!’ cried Alice in a 
sorrowful tone. “I’m afraid I’ve offended 
it again!” For the Mouse was swimming 
away from her as hard as it could go, and 
making quite a commotion in the pool as it 
went. 

So she called softly after it: “Mouse dear! 
Do come back again, and we won’t talk about 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


cats or dogs either, if you don’t like them!” 
when the Mouse heard this, it turned round 
and swam slowly back to her: its face was 
quite pale (with passion, Alice thought), and 
it said in a low, trembling voice, “Let us get 
to the shore, and then I’ll tell you my history 
and you’ll understand why it is I hate cats 
and dogs.” 

It was high time to go for the pool was get- 
ting quite crowded with the birds and animals 
that had fallen into it: there was a Duck and 
a Dodo, a Lory and an Eaglet, and several 
other curious creatures. Alice led the way, 
and the whole party swam to the shore. 



A CAUCUS-RACE AND A LONG TALE. 

T HEY were indeed a queer-looking 
party that assembled on the bank — 
the birds with draggled feathers, the 
animals with their fur clinging close to them, 
and all dripping wet, cross, and uncomfortable. 

The first question of course was, how to get 
dry again : they had a consultation about this, 
and after a few minutes it seemed quite natural 
to Alice to find herself talking familiarly 
them, as if she had known them all her life. 
Indeed, she had quite a long argument with the 
Lory, w T ho at last turned sulky, and would 
only say, “I am older than you, and must 
know better and this Alice would not allow, 
without knowing how old it was, and as the 
Lory positively refused to tell its age, there 
was no more to be said. 




At last the Mouse, who seemed to be a per- 
son of some authority among them, called out, 
“Sit down, all of you,' and listen to me! Til 
soon make you dry enough !” They all sat 
down at once, in a large circle, with 
the Mouse in the middle. Alice kept her eyes 
anxiously fixed on it, for she felt sure 
she would catch a bad cold if she did not get 
dry very soon. 

“Ahem!” said the Mouse with an important 
air, “are you all ready? This is the dryest 
thing I know. Silence all round, if you please! 
‘William the Conqueror, whose cause was 
favored by the pope, was soon submitted to 
by the English, who wanted leaders, and had 
been of late much accustomed to usurpation 
and conquest. Edwin and Morcar, the earls 
of Mercia and Northumbria- 

“Ugh!” said the Lory, with a shiver. 

“I beg your pardon?” said the Mouse, 
frowning, but very politely: “Did you speak?” 
“Not I!” said the Lory, hastily. 

“I thought you did,” said the Mouse. “I 

[ 26 ] 






IN WONDERLAND 


proceed. ‘Edwin and Morcar, the earls of 
Mercia and Northumbria, declared for him; 
and even Stigand, the patriotic archbishop of 
Canterbury, found it advisable 5 ” 

“Found what?” said the Duck. 

“Found it” the Mouse replied rather cross- 
ly: “of course you know what ‘it’ means.” 

“I know what ‘it’ means well enough when* 
I find a thing,” said the Duck: “it’s generally 
a frog or a worm. The question is, what did 
the archbishop find?” 

The Mouse did not notice this question, but 
hurriedly went on, “ ‘Found it advisable to go 
with Edgar Atheling to meet William and 
offer him the crown. William’s conduct at/ 
first was moderate. Eut the insolence of his' 

N Ormans’ Flow are you getting on now, 

my dear?” he continued, turning to Alice as 
he spoke. 

“As wet as ever,” said Alice in a melancholy 
tone: “it doesn’t seem to dry me at all.” 

“In that case,” said the Dodo solemnly, ris- 
ing to its feet, “I move that the meeting ad- 
[ 27 ] 



journ, for the immediate adoption of more en- 
ergetic remedies ” 

“Speak English!” said the Eaglet. “I don’t 
know the meaning of half those long words, 
and what’s more, I don’t believe you do 
either!” And the Eaglet bent down his head 
to hide a smile: some of the other birds tittered 
audibly. 

“What I was going to say,” said the Dodo 
in an offended tone, “was, that the best thing 
to get us dry would be a caucus-race.” 

“What is a caucus-race?” said Alice; not 
that she much wanted to know, but the Dodo 
had paused as if it thought that somebody 
ought to speak, and no one else seemed in- 
clined to say anything. 

“Why,” said the Dodo, “the best way to ex- 
plain it is to do it.” (And as you might like 
to try the thing yourself, some winter day, I 
will tell you how the Dodo managed it.) 

First it marked out a race-course, in a sort 
of circle (“the exact shape doesn’t matter,” it 
said) , and then all the party were placed along 
[ 28 ] 


the course, here and there. There was no “One, 
two, three, and away,” but they began running 
when they liked and left off when they liked 
so that it was not easy to know when the race 
was over. However, when they had been run- 
ning half an hour or so, and were quite dry 
again, the Dodo suddenly called out, “The race 
is over!” and they all crowded round it, pant- 
ing, and asking, “But who has won?” 

This question the Dodo could not answer 
without a great deal of thought, and it sat for 
a long time with one finger pressed upon its 
forehead (the position in which you usually 
see Shakespeare, in the pictures of him), while 
the rest waited in silence. At last the Dodo 
said, “Everybody has won, and all must have 
prizes.” 

“But who is to give the prizes?” quite a 
chorus of voices asked. 

“Why, she , of course,” said the Dodo, point- 
ing to Alice with one finger; and the whole 
party at once crowded round her, calling out in 
a confused way, “Prizes, prizes!” 

[ 29 ] 




ALICES ADVENTURES 


Alice had no idea what to do, and in despair 
she put her hand into her pocket, and pulled 
out a box of comfits (luckily the salt water had 
not got into it), and handed them round as 
prizes. There was exactly one a-piece, all 
round. 

“But she must have a prize herself, you 
know,” said the Mouse. 

“Of course,” the Dodo replied very gravely. 
“What else have you got in your pocket?” he 
went on, turning to Alice. 

“Only a thimble,” said Alice sadly. 

“Hand it over here,” said the Dodo. 

Then they all crowded round her once more, 
while the Dodo solemnly presented the thim- 
ble, saying, “We beg your acceptance of this 
elegant thimble;” and, when it had finished 
this short speech, they all cheered. 

Alice thought the whole thing very absurd, 
Ibut they all looked so grave that she did not 
[dare to laugh, and as she could not think of 
anything to say, she simply bowed, and took 
the thimble, looking as solemn as she could. 
[ 30 ] 





“ Wit beg pour acceptance 
of tfjtsi elegant tfjimtile/' 


Page 30 






















































































































































• • 










































♦ 




































































































































J 















































The next thing was to eat the comfits: this 
caused some noise and confusion, as the large 
birds complained that they could not taste 
theirs, and the small ones choked and had to 
be patted on the back. However it was over 
at last, and they sat down again in a ring, and 
begged the Mouse to tell them something 
more. 

“You promised to tell me your history, you 
know,” said Alice, “and why it is you hate — C 
and D,” she added in a whisper, half afraid 
that it would be offended again. 

“Mine is a long and a sad tale!” said the 
Mouse, turning to Alice, and sighing. 

“It is a long tail, certainly,” said Alice, look- 
ing down with wonder at the Mouse’s tail; “but 
why do you call it sad?” And she kept on 
uzzling about it while the Mouse was speak- 
ing, so that her idea of the tale was something 
like this : 



[ 31 ] 


\0 



Fury said to 

a mouse. That 
he met 
in the 
house, 

‘ Let us 
both go 
to law: 

I will 
prosecute 
you . — 

Come I'll 
take no 
denial: 

\Ye must 
have a 
trial ; 

For 

really 

this 

morning 
I’ve 
nothing 
to do.’ 

Said the 
mouse to 
the cur, 

‘ Such a 
trial, 
dear sir, 

With no 
jury or 

ia wSd be 
wasting 
our breath.’ 

‘I’ll be 
judge, 


Said 
Cunning 
old Fury ; 

‘I’ll try 
the whole 


cause, 

and 

condemn 

you 

to 

death.’ ” 





IN WONDERLAND 

“You are not attending !” said the Mouse 
to Alice, severely. “What are you thinking 
of?” 

“I beg your pardon,” said Alice very hum- 
bly: “you had got to the fifth bend, I think?” 

“I had not!” cried the Mouse, sharply and 
very angrily. 

“A knot!” said Alice, always ready to make 
herself useful, and looking anxiously about 
her. “Oh, do let me help undo it!” 

“I shall do nothing of the sort,” said the 
Mouse, getting up and walking away. “You 
insult me by talking such nonsense!” 

“I didn’t mean it!” pleaded poor Alice. “But 
you’re so easily offended, you know!” 

The Mouse only growled in reply. 

“Please come back, and finish your story!” 
Alice called after it; and the others all joined 
in chorus, “Yes, please do!” but the Mouse 
only shook its head impatiently, and walked 
a little quicker. 

“What a pity it wouldn’t stay!” sighed the 
Lory, as soon as it was quite out of sight; and 
[ 33 ] 









ALICES ADVENTURES 


an old crab took the opportunity of saying to 
her daughter, “Ah, my dear! Let this be a | 
lesson to you never to lose your temper!’ 1 
“Hold your tongue, ma!” said the young crab, 
a bit snappishly. “You’re enough to try the 
patience of an oyster!” 

“I wish I had our Dinah here, I know I do!” 
said Alice aloud, adressing nobody in particu- 
lar. “She’d soon fetch it back!” 

“And who is Dinah, if I might venture to 
ask the question?” said the Lory. 

Alice replied eagerly, for she was always 
ready to talk about her pet. “Dinah’s our 
cat. And she’s such a capital one for catching 
mice, you can’t think! And oh, I wish you 
could see her after the birds ! Why, she’ll eat 
a little bird as soon as look at it!” 

This speech caused a remarkable sensation 
among the party. Some of the birds hurried 
off at once : one old magpie began wrapping it- 
self up very carefully, remarking, “I really 
rust be getting home; the night air doesn’t 
suit my throat!” and a canary called out in a 
[ 34 ] 





IN WONDERLAND 


trembling voice to its children, “Come away, 
my dears ! It’s high time you were all in bed I” 
On various pretexts they all moved off, and 
Alice was soon left alone. 

“I wish I hadn’t mentioned Dinah!” she said 
to herself in a melancholy tone. “Nobody 
seems to like her, down here, and I’m sure she’s 
the best cat in the world ! Oh, my dear Dinah ! 
I wonder if I shall ever see you any more!” 
And here poor Alice began to cry again, for she 
felt very lonely and low-spirited. In a little 
while, however, she again heard a little patter- 
ing of footsteps in the distance, and she looked 
up eagerly, half hoping that the Mouse had 
changed his mind and was coming back 
finish his story. 




ALICES ADVEHTURES 


THE RABBIT SENDS IN A LITTLE BILL. 


I T was the White Rabbit, trotting slowly 
back again, and looking anxiously about 
as it went, as if it had lost something ; and 
she heard it muttering to itself, “The Duchess! 
The Duchess! Oh my dear paws! Oh my 
fur and whiskers! She’ll get me executed, as 
sure as ferrets are ferrets! Where can I have 
dropped them, I wonder!” Alice guessed in 
a moment that it was looking for the fan and 
the pair of white kid gloves, and she very good^ 
naturedly began hunting about for them, 
they were nowhere to be seen — everything 
seemed to have changed since her swim in the 
pool, and the great hall, with the glass table 
and the little door, had vanished completely. 
Very soon the Rabbit noticed Alice, as she 
[ 36 ] 



went hunting about, and called out to her in 
an angry tone, “Why, Mary Ann, what are 
you doing out here? Run home this moment, 
and fetch me a pair of gloves and a fan! Quick, 
now!” And Alice was so much frightened 
that she ran off at once in the direction it point- 
ed to, without trying to explain the mistake 
that it had made. 

“He took me for his housemaid,” she said 
to herself as she ran. “How surprised he’ll 
be when he finds out who I am! But I’d bet- 
ter take him his fan and gloves — that is, if I 
can find them.” As she said this, she came 
upon a neat little house, on the door of which 
was a bright brass plate with the name “W. 
RABBIT,” engraved upon it. She went in 
without knocking, and hurried upstairs, in 
5 great fear lest she should meet the real Mary 
Ann, and be turned out of the house before 
she had found the fan and gloves. 

“How queer it seems,” Alice said to her- 
self, “to be going messages for a rabbit! I 
suppose Dinah’ll be sending me on messages 
[ 37 ] 





ALICES ADVENTURES 


next!” And she began fancying the sort of 
thing that would happen: “ ‘Miss Alice! 
Come here directly, and get ready for your 
walk!’ ‘Coming in a minute, nurse! But 
I’ve got to watch this mousehole till Dinah 
comes back, and see that the mouse doesn’t get 
out’ Only I don’t think,” Alice went on, 
“that they’d let Dinah stop in the house if it 
began ordering people about like that!” 

By this time she had found her way into a 
tidy little room with a table in the window, and 
on it (as she had hoped) a fan and two or 
three pairs of tiny white kid gloves: she took 
up the fan and a pair of the gloves, and was 
just going to leave the room, when her eye 
fell upon a little bottle that stood near the 
looking glass. There was no label this time 
with the words “DRINK ME,” but neverthe- 
less she uncorked it and put it to her lips. “I 
know something interesting is sure to happen,” 
she said to herself, “whenever I eat or drink 
anything; so I’ll just see what this bottle does. 
I do hope it’ll make me grow large again, for 
[ 38 ] 



- 

. 









mm. 


“3 tope 3 shan’t 

groto anp more/’ 


Page 3Q 






really I’m quite tired of being such a tiny 
little thing!” 


It did so indeed, and much sooner than she 
had expected; before she had drunk half the 
bottle, she found her head pressing against the 
ceiling, and had to stoop to save her neck from 
being broken. She hastily put down the bot- 
tle, saying to heself, “That’s quite enough — I 
hope I shan’t grow any more — As it is, I can’t 
get out at the door — I do wish I hadn’t drunk 
quite so much!” 

Alas! It was too late to wish that! She 
went on growing and growing, and very soon 
had to kneel down on the floor ; in another min- 
ute there was not even room for this, and she 
tried the effect of lying down, with one elbow 
against the door, and the other arm curled 
round her head. Still she went on growing, 
and, as a last resource, she put one arm out of 
the window, and one foot up the chimney, and 
said to herself, “Now I can do no more, what- 
ever happens. What mil become of me?” 

Luckily for Alice, the little magic bottle had 
[ 39 ] 




ALICES ADVENTURES 




now had its full effect, and she grew no larger: 
still it was very uncomfortable, and, as therej 
seemed to be no sort of chance of her ever get- 
ting out of the room again, no wonder she felt 
unhappy. 

“It was much pleasanter at home,” thought 
poor Alice, “when one wasn’t always growing 
larger and smaller, and being ordered about by 
mice and rabbits. I almost wish I hadn’t gone 
down that rabbit-hole — and yet — and yet — 
it’s rather curious, you know, this sort of life! 
I do wonder what can have happened to me! 
When I used to read fairy-tales, I fancied that 
kind of thing never happened, and now here 
I am in the middle of one. There ought to be 
a book written about me, that there ought! 
And when I grow up, I’ll write one — but I’m 
grown up now,” she added in a sorrowful tone, 
“at least there’s no room to grow up any more 
here ” 

“But then,” thought Alice, “shall I never 
get any older than I am now? That’ll be a 
comfort, one way — never to be an old woman 
[ 40 ] 





IN WONDERLAND 


— but then always to have lessons to learn ! Oh, 
I shouldn’t like that ." 

“Oh, you foolish Alice!” she answered her- 
self. “How can you learn lessons in 
Why, there’s hardly room for you, and no 
room at all for any lesson-books!” 

And so she went on, taking first one side 
and then the other, and making quite a 
versation of it altogether, but after a few min- 
utes she heard a voice, outside, and stopped to 
listen. 

“Mary Ann! Mary Ann!” said the voice, 
“fetch me my gloves this moment!” Then 
came a little pattering of feet on the stairs. 
Alice knew it was the Rabbit coming to 
for her, and she trembled till she shook 
house, quite forgetting that she was now about 
a thousand times as large as the Rabbit, and 
had no reason to be afraid of it. 

Presently the Rabbit came up to the door, 
and tried to open it, but as the door opened 
inward, and Alice’s elbow was pressed hard 
against it, that attempt proved a failure. Alice 




ALICES ADVENTURES 


heard it say to itself, “Then 
I’ll go round and get in at 
the window.” 

“That you won’t!” 
thought Alice, and, after 
waiting till she fancied she 
heard the Rabbit just under 
the window, she suddenly 
spread out her hand, and 
made a snatch in the air. 
She did not get hold of any- 
thing, but she heard a little 
shriek and a fall, and a 
crash of broken glass, from 
which she concluded 
that it was just possi- 
ble it had fallen into a 
cucumber frame, or 
something of the sort. 
Next came an angry voice 
the Rabbit’s — “Pat! Pat! 
tVVhere are you?” And then 
a voice she had never heard 
[ 42 ] 








before, “Sure then I’m here! Digging for 
apples, yer honor!” 

“Digging for apples, indeed!” said the Rab- 
bit angrily. Here! Come and help me out 
of this!” (Sounds of more broken glass.) 

“Now tell me, Pat, what’s that in the win- 
dow?” 

“Sure, it’s an arm, yer honor!” (He pro- 
nounced it “arrum.”) 

“An arm, you goose! Who ever saw 
one that size? Why, it fills the whole win- 
dow!” 

“Sure it does, yer honor; but it’s an arm for 
all that.” 

“Well, it’s got no business there, at any rate; 
go and take it away!” 

There was a long silence after this, and Alice 
^^could only hear whispers now and then, such 
as, “Sure I don’t like it, yer honor, at all at 
all!” 

“Do as I tell you, you coward!” and at last 
she spread out her hand again and made an- 
other snatch in the air. This time there were 
[ 43 ] 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


two little shrieks, and more sounds of broken 
glass. “What a number of cucumber frames 
there must be!” thought Alice. “I wonder 
what they’ll do next! As for pulling me out 
of the window, I only wish they could . I’m 
sure I don’t want to stay in here any 
longer!” 

She waited for some time without hearing 
anything more: at last came a rumbling of 
little cart-wheels, and the sound of a good 
many voices all talking together ; she made out 
the words, “Where’s the other ladder? — Why, 
I hadn’t to bring but one ; Bill’s got the other 
— Bill! fetch it here, lad — Here, put ’em up 
at this corner — No, tie ’em together first — they 
don’t reach half high enough yet — Oh! they’ll 
do well enough; don’t be particular — Here, 
Bill! catch hold of this rope — Will the roof 
\bear? — Mind that loose slate — Oh, it’s coming 
\down! Heads below!” (a loud crash) — “Now, 
vho did that? — It was Bill, I fancy — Who’s to 
?o down the chimney? — Nay, I shan’t! You 
do it! — That I won’t then! — Bill’s got to go 
[ 44 ] 




IN WONDERLAND 


down — Here, Bill! the master says you’ve got 
to go down the chimney!” 

“Oh, so Bill’s got to come down the chim- 
ney, has he?” said Alice to herself. “Why, 
they seem to put everything upon Bill! I 
wouldn’t be in Bill’s place for a good deal ; this 
fireplace is narrow, to be sure, but I think I 
can kick a little.” 

She drew her foot as far down the chimney 
as she could, and waited till she heard a little 
animal (she couldn’t guess of what sort it was) 
scratching and scrambling about in the chim- 
ney close above her; then, saying to herself, 
/‘This is Bill,” she gave one sharp kick, and 
waited to see what would happen next. 

The first thing she heard was a general 
of “There goes Bill!” then the Rabbit’s 
voice alone, “Catch him, you by the hedge!” 
then silence, and then another confusion of 
voices — “Hold up his head — Brandy now — 
Don’t choke him — How was it, old fellow? 
What happened to you? Tell us all about it!” 

Last came a little feeble squeaking voice 




ALICES ADVENTURES 

(“That’s Bill,” thought Alice) , “Well, I hard- 
ly know — no more, thank’ye, I’m better now- 
but I’m a deal too flustered to tell you — all I 
know is, something comes at me like a J ack-in- 
the-box, and up I goes like a sky-rocket!” 

“So you did, old fellow!” said the others. 

“We must burn the house down!” said the 
Rabbit’s voice, and Alice called out as loud as 
she could, “If you do, I’ll set Dinah at 
you!” 

There was a dead silence instantly, and Alice 
thought to herself, “I wonder what they will 
do next? If they had any sense, they’d take 
the roof off.” After a minute or two they 
began moving about again, and Alice heard 
the Rabbit say, “A barrowful will do, to begin 
with” 

“A barrowful of what?” thought Alice; but 
she had not long to doubt, for the next moment 
a shower of little pebbles came rattling in at 
the window, and some of them hit her in the 
face. “I’ll put a stop to this,” she said to her- 
self, and shouted out, “You’d better not do 
[ 46 ] 





Of 


IN WONDERLAND 


that again!” which produced another dead si- 
lence. 

Alice noticed with some surprise that the 
pebbles were all turning into little cakes as 
they lay on the floor, and a bright idea came 
into her head. “If I eat one of these cakes,” 
she thought, “It’s sure to make some change 
in my size: and as it can’t possibly make me 
larger, it must make me smaller, I suppose.” 

So she swallowed one of the cakes, and was 
delighted to find that she began shrinking di- 
rectly. As soon as she was small enough to 
get through the door, she ran out of the house, 
and found quite a crowd of little animals and 
birds waiting outside. The poor little lizard, 
Bill, was in the middle, being held up by two 
guinea-pigs, who were giving it something out 
a bottle. They all made a rush at Alice the 
moment she appeared, but she ran off as hard 
as she could, and soon found herself safe in 
a thick wood. 

“The first thing I’ve got to do,” said Alice 
to herself, as she wandered about in the wood, 
[ 47 ] 








ALICES ADVENTURES 



“is to grow to my right size again; and the 
second thing is to find my way into that / 
lovely garden. I think that will be the \ 
best plan.” 

It sounded an excellent plan, no doubt, and 





very neatly and simply arranged ; the only dif- 
ficulty was, that she had not the smallest idea 
how to set about it; and while she was peering 
about anxiously among the trees, a little sharp 
[ 48 ] 








bark just over her head made her look up in a 
great hurry. 

An enormous puppy was looking down at 
her with large round eyes, and feebly stretch- 
ing out one paw, trying to touch her. “Poor 
little thing!” said Alice in a coaxing tone, and 
she tried hard to whistle to it, but she was ter- 
ribly frightened all the time at the thought that 
it might be hungry, in which case it would be 
very likely to eat her up in spite of all her 
coaxing. 

Hardly knowing what she did, she picked 
up a little bit of stick, and held it out to the 
puppy; whereupon the puppy jumped into the 
air off all its feet at once, with a yelp of delight, 
and rushed at the stick, and made believe to 
worry it; then Alice dodged behind a great 
to keep herself from being run over, 
and, the moment she appeared on the other 
side, the puppy made another rush at the stick, 
and tumbled head over heels in its hurry to get 
hold of it; then Alice, thinking it was very like 
having a game of play with a cart-horse, and 

r 49i 


IN WONDERLAND 




expecting every moment to be trampled under 
his feet, ran around the thistle again; then the/ 
puppy began a series of short charges at the\ 
stick, running a very little way forward each 
time and a long way back, and barking hoarse- 
ly all the while, till at last it sat down a good 
way off, panting, with its tongue hanging out 
of its mouth, and its great eyes half shut. 

This seemed to Alice a good opportunity for 
making her escape, so she set off at once, and 
ran till she was quite tired and out of breath, 
and till the puppy’s bark sounded quite faint 
in the distance. 

“And yet what a dear little puppy it was,” 
said Alice, as she leaned against a buttercup 
to rest herself, and fanned herself with one of 
the leaves: “I should have liked teaching it 
tricks very much, if — if I’d only been the right 
size to do it! Oh dear! I’d nearly forgotten 
that I’ve got to grow up again. Let me see — 
how is it to be managed? I suppose I ought 
to eat or drink something or other; but the 
great question is, what?” 

[ 50 ] 



























' 




J * 















" ■M»^*«**»** -, *‘***’^*« k *'*' 

; ?v . v BP* ' r ■ * • ;' f 



;*ji 

&&$ 


IF* 


F V 

MfCX \ * 

iS wim ann 


Her eyes met tfjose of a 
large blue caterpillar. 


Page ji 




IN WONDERLAND 


The great question certainly was, what? 
Alice looked all round her at the flowers and 
the blades of grass, but she could not see any- 
thing that looked like the right thing to eat 
or drink under the circumstances. There was 
a large mushroom growing near her, about the 
same height as herself, and when she had 
looked under it, and on both sides of it, and 
behind it, it occurred to her that she might as 
well look and see what was on the top of it. 

She stretched herself up on tiptoe, and 
peeped over the edge of the mushroom, and 
her eyes immediately met those of a large blue 
caterpillar, that was sitting on the top with 
its arms folded, quietly smoking a long hookah, 
and taking not the smallest notice of her or 
of anything else. 

Sr 




each other in silence : at last the Cater- 
pillar took the hookah out of its 
mouth, and addressed her in a languid, sleepy 
voice. 

“Who are you ? 33 said the Caterpillar. 

This was not an encouraging opening for 
a conversation. Alice replied rather shyly, “I 
— I hardly know, sir, just at present — at least 
I know who I was when I got up this morning, 
but I think I must have been changed several 
times since then. 

“What do you mean by that?” said 
Caterpillar sternly. “Explain yourself.” 

“I cannot explain myself I’m afraid, sir, 
said Alice, “because I’m not myself, you see.” 

“I don’t see,” said the Caterpillar. 

“I’m afraid I can’t put it more clearly,” 



IN WONDERLAND 


Alice replied politely, “for I can’t understand 
it myself to begin with; and being so many 
different sizes in a day is very confusing.” 

“It isn’t,” said the Caterpillar. 

“Well, perhaps you haven’t found it so yet,” 
said Alice; but when you have to turn into a 
chrysalis — you will some day, you know — and 
then after that into a butterfly, I should 
you’ll feel it a little queer, won’t you?” 

“Not a bit,” said the Caterpillar. 

“Well, perhaps your feelings may be differ- 
ent,” said Alice; “all I know is, it would feel 
very queer to me” 

“You!” said the Caterpillar contemptuously. 
“Who are you?” 

Which brought them back again to the 
ginning of the conversation. Alice felt a little 
irritated at the caterpillar’s making such very 
short remarks, and she drew herself up and 
said, very gravely, “I think you ought to tell 
me who you are, first.” 

“Why?” said the Caterpillar. 

Here was another puzzling question; and, 
[ 53 ] 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


as Alice could not think of any good reason, 
and as the Caterpillar seemed to be in a very 
unpleasant state of mind, she turned away. 

“Come back!” the Caterpillar called after 
her. “I’ve something important to say!” 

This sounded promising, certainly: Alice 
turned and came back again. 

“Keep your temper,” said the Caterpillar. 

“Is that all?” said Alice, swallowing down 
her anger as well as she could. 

“No,” said the Caterpillar. 

Alice thought she might as well wait, as she 
had nothing else to do, and perhaps after all it 
might tell her something worth hearing. For 
some minutes it puffed away without speak- 
ing, but at last it unfolded its arms, took the 
hookah out of its mouth again, and said, “So 
you think you’re changed, do you?” 

Tm afraid I am, sir,” said Alice; “I can’t 
things as I used — and I don’t keep 
same size for ten minutes together!” 

‘Can’t remember what things?” said the 
Caterpillar. 





8ft 


IN WONDERLAND 


much contradicted in all her life before, and 
she felt that she was losing her temper. 

“Are you content now?” said the Cater- 
pillar. 

“Well, I should like to be a little larger, sir, 
if you wouldn’t mind,” said Alice: “three inches 
is such a wretched height to be.” 

“It is a very good height indeed!” said 
Caterpillar angrily, rearing itself upright as 
it spoke (it was exactly three inches high). 

“But I’m not used to it!” pleaded poor Alice 
in a piteous tone. And she thought to herself, 
“I wish the creatures wouldn’t be so easily of- 
fended!” 

“You’ll get used to it in time,” said 
Caterpillar; and it put the hookah into 
mouth and began smoking again. 

This time Alice waited patiently until it 
chose to speak again. In a minute or two the 
Caterpillar took the hookah out of its mouth 
and yawned once or twice, and shook itself. 
Then it got down off the mushroom, and 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


as it went, “One side will make you grow taller, 
and the other side will make you grow shorter.” 

“One side of wliat? The other side of 
what?” thought Alice to herself. 

“Of the mushroom,” said the Caterpillar 
just as if she asked it aloud; and in an- 
other moment it was out of sight. 

Alice remained looking thoughtfully at the 
mushroom for a minute trying to make out 
which were the two sides of it; and, as it was 
perfectly round, she found this a very difficult 
question. However, at last she stretched her 
arms round it as far as they would go, and 
broke off a bit of the edge with each hand. 

“And now which is which?” she said to her- 
self, and nibbled a little of the right-hand bit 
to try the effect: the next moment she felt a 
violent blow underneath her chin ; it had struck , 
her foot ! 

She was a good deal frightened by this very 
change, but she felt that there was no 
e to be lost, as she was shrinking rapidly ; 
so she set to work at once to eat some of the 




other bit. Her chin was pressed so closely 
against her foot, that there was hardly room 
to open her mouth; but she did it at last, and 
managed to swallow a morsel of the left-hand 
bit. 



“Come, my head’s free at last!” said Alice 
in a tone of delight, which changed into alarm 
in another moment, when she found that her 
shoulders were nowhere to be found: all she 
could see, when she looked down, was an im- 
mense length of neck, which seemed to rise 
like a stalk out of a sea of green leaves that 
lay far below her. 

“What can all that green stuff be?” said 
Alice. “And where have my shoulders got to? 
And oh, my poor hands, how is it I can’t see 
you?” She was moving them about as she 
spoke, but no result seemed to follow, except a 
little shaking among the distant green leaves. 
[ 59 ] 









ALICES ADVENTURES 


As there seemed to be no chance of getting 
her hands up to her head, she tried to get her / 
head down to them, and was delighted to find* 
that her neck would bend about easily in any 
direction, like a serpent. She had just suc- 
ceeded in curving it down into a graceful zig- 
zag, and was going to dive in among the leaves, 
which she found to be nothing but the tops of 
the trees under which she had been wandering, 
when a sharp hiss made her draw back in a 
hurry: a large pigeon had flown into her face, 
and was beating her violently with its wings. 

“Serpent!’ screamed the Pigeon. 

“I’m not a serpent!” said Alice indignantly. 
“Let me alone!” 

“Serpent, I say again!” repeated the 
Pigeon, but in a more subdued tone, and added' 
with a kind of sob, “I’ve tried every way, and^ 
nothing seems to suit them!” 

“I haven’t the least idea what you’re talk- 
ing about,” said Alice. 

‘I’ve tried the roots of trees, and I’ve tried 
banks, and I’ve tried hedges,” the Pigeon went 
[ 60 ] 







IN WONDERLAND 


on, without attending to her; “but those ser- 
pents; There’s no pleasing them!” 

Alice was more and more puzzled, but she 
thought there was no use in saying anything 
more till the Pigeon had finished. 

“As if it wasn’t trouble enough hatching the 
eggs,” said the Pigeon, “but I must be on the 
lookout for serpents night and day! Why, I 
haven’t had a wink of sleep these three weeks !” 

“I’m very sorry you’ve been annoyed,” 
said Alice, who was beginning to see its mean- 
ing. 

“And just as I’d taken the highest tree in 
the wood,” continued the Pigeon, raising its 
voice to a shriek, “and just as I was thinking | 
I should be free of them at last, they must 
needs come wriggling down from the sky! 

^Ugh! Serpent!” 

“But I’m not a serpent, I tell you!” said 
Alice, “I’m a — I’m a ” 

“Well! What are you?” said the Pigeon. 
“I can see you’re trying to invent something!” 

“I — I’m a little girl,” said Alice, rather 

[ 61 ] 



ALICES ADVENTURES 

doubtfully, as she remembered the number of 
changes she had gone through that day. 

“A likely story indeed!” said the Pigeon in 
a tone of deepest contempt. u I’ve seen a good 
many little girls in my time, but never one with 
such a neck as that! No, no! You’re a ser- 
pent; and there’s no use denying it. I sup- 
pose you’ll be telling me next that you never 
tasted an egg!” 

“I have tasted eggs, certainly,” said Alice, 
who was a very truthful child; “but little girls 
eat eggs quite as much as serpents do, you 
know.” 

“I don’t believe it,” said the Pigeon; “but 
if they do, why then they’re a kind of serpent, 
that’s all I can say.” 

This was such a new idea to Alice, that she 
was quite silent for a minute or two, which 
gave the Pigeon the opportunity of adding, 
“You’re looking for eggs, I know that well 
enough ; and what does it matter to me whether 
you’re a little girl or a serpent?” 

“It matters a good deal to me ” said Alice 

[ 62 ] 





hastily; “but I’m not looking for eggs, as it 
happens ; and if I was, I shouldn’t want yours : 
I don’t like them raw.” 


“Well, be off, then!” said the Pigeon in a 
sulky tone, as it settled down again into its 
nest. Alice crouched down among the trees 
as well as she could, for her neck kept getting 
entangled among the branches, and every now 
and then she had to stop and untwist it. After 
awhile she remembered that she still held the 
pieces of mushroom in her hands, and she set 
to work very carefully, nibbling first at one 
and then at the other, and growing sometimes 
taller and sometimes shorter, until she had suc- 
ceeded in bringing herself down to her usual 
height. 

It was so long since she had been anything 
near the right size, that it felt quite strange at 
first, but she got used to it in a few minutes, 
and began talking to herself as usual. “Come, 
there’s half my plan done now! How puzzling 
all these changes are! I’m never sure what 
I’m going to be, from one minute to another! 

[ 63 ] 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


However, I’ve got back to my right size: the 
next thing is, to get into that beautiful garden 
— how is that to be done, I wonder?” As she 
said this, she came suddenly upon an open 
place, with a little house in it about four feet 
high. “Whoever lives there,” thought Alice, 
“it’ll never do to come upon them this size: 
why, I should frighten them out of their wits!” 
So she began nibbling at the right-hand bit 
again, and did not venture to go near the house 
till she had brought herself down to nine inches 
high. 






PIG AND PEPPER. 

F OR a minute or two she stood looking at 
the house, and wondering what to do 
next, when suddenty a footman in liv- 
ery came running out of the wood ( she consid- 
ered him to be a footman because he was in liv- 
ery: otherwise, judging by his face only, she 
would have called him a fish) and rapped loud- 
ly at the door with his knuckles. It was opened 
by another footman in livery, with a round face 
and large eyes like a frog; and both footmen, 
Alice noticed, had powdered hair that curled 
all over their heads. She felt very curious to 
know what it was all about, and crept a little 
way out of the wood to listen. 

The Fish-Footman began by producing 
from imder his arm a great letter, nearly as 
large as himself, and this he handed over to 
[ 65 ] 






the other, saying in a solemn tone, “For the 
Duchess. An invitation from the Queen to 
play croquet.” The Frog-Footman repeated 
in the same solemn tone, only changing the 
order of the words a little, “From the Queen. 
An invitation for the Duchess to play cro- 
quet.” 

Then they both bowed low, and their curls 
got entangled together. 

Alice laughed so much at this that she had 
to run back into the wood for fear of their 
hearing her, and when she next peeped out 
the Fish-Footman was gone, and the other was 
sitting on the ground near the door, staring 
stupidly up into the sky. 

Alice went timidly up to the door, and 
knocked. 

“There’s no sort of use in knocking,” said 
the Footman, “and that for two reasons. First, 
because I’m on the same side of the door as 
'you are; secondly, because they’re making such 
\ a noise inside, no one could possibly hear you.” 
And certainly there was a most extraordinary 
[ 66 ] 



< 









IH WONDERLAND 

noise going on within — a constant howling and 
sneezing, and every now and then a great 
crash, as if a dish or kettle had been broken to 
pieces. 

“Please, then,” said Alice, “how am I to get 
in?” 

“There might be some sense in your knock- 
ing,” the Footman went on without attending 
to her, “if we had the door between us. For 
instance, if you were inside , you might knock, 
and I could let you out, you know.” He was 
looking up into the sky all the time he was 
speaking, and this Alice thought decidedly un- 
civil. “But perhaps he can’t help it,” she said 
to herself; “his eyes are so very nearly at the 
top of his head. But at any rate he might 
answer questions — How am I to get in?” she 
repeated, aloud. 

“I shall sit here,” the Footman remarked, 
“till to-morrow ” 

At this moment the door of the house 
opened, and a large plate came skimming out, 
straight at the Footman’s head: it just grazed 
[ 67 ] 




ALICES ADVENTURES 


his nose, and broke to pieces against one of y 
the trees behind him. 

“ or next day, maybe,” the Footma] 

continued in the same tone, exactly as if noth- 
ing had happened. 

“How am I to get in?” Alice asked again 
in a louder tone. 

“Are you to get in at all?” said the Footman. 
“That’s the first question, you know.” 

It was, no doubt: only Alice did not like to 
be told so. “It’s really dreadful,” she mut- 
tered to herself, “the way all the creatures 
argue. It’s enough to drive one crazy!” 

The Footman seemed to think this a good 
opportunity for repeating his remark, with 
variations. “I shall sit here,” he said, “on and 
off, for days and days.” 

“But what am I to do?” said Alice. 

“Anything you like,” said the Footman, 
began whistling. 

“Oh, there’s no use in talking to him,” said 
Alice desperately; “he’s perfectly idiotic!” 
And she opened the door and went in. 

[ 68 ] 




which was full of smoke .from one end to the 
other: the Duchess was sitting on a three- 
legged stool in the middle, nursing a baby ; 
cook was leaning over the fire, stirring a large 
caldron which seemed to be full of soup. 

“There’s certainly too much pepper in that 
soup!” Alice said to herself, as well as 
could for sneezing. 

There was certainly too much of it in the 
air. Even the Duchess sneezed occasionally; 
and as for the baby, it was sneezing and howl- 
ing alternately without a moment’s pause. The 
only two creatures in the kitchen that did not 
sneeze, were the cook, and a large cat 
was sitting on the hearth and grinning 
ear to ear. 

“Please, would you tell me,” said Alice, a 
little timidly, for she was not quite sure 
whether it was good manners for her to speak 
first, “why your cat grins like that?” 

“It’s a Cheshire cat,” said the Duchess, “and 




ALICES ADVENTURES 



She said the last word with such sudden 
violence that Alice quite jumped; but she saw 
in another moment that it was addressed to the 
baby, and not to her, so she took courage, and 
went on again: 

“I didn’t know that Cheshire cats always 
grinned; in fact, I didn’t know that cats could 
grin.” 

“They all can,” said the Duchess; “and most 
of ’em do.” 

“I don’t know of any that do,” Alice said 
very politely, feeling quite pleased to have got 
into a conversation. 

“You don’t know much,” said the Duchess; 
“and that’s a fact.” 

Alice did not at all like the tone of this re- 
mark, and thought it would be as well to in- 
troduce some other subject of conversation. 
While she was trying to fix on one, the cook 
Uook the caldron of soup off the fire, and at 
j once set to work throwing everything within 
Mier reach at the Duchess and the baby — the 
fire-irons came first; then followed a shower 
[ 70 ] 








* 


9 



IN WONDERLAND 


of saucepans, plates and dishes. The Duchess 
took no notice of them, even when they hit her; 
and the baby was howling so much already, 
that it was quite impossible to say whether the 
blows hurt it or not. 

“Oh, please mind what you are doing!” cried 
Alice, jumping up and down in an agony of 
terror. “Oh, there goes his precious nose!” as 
an unusually large saucepan flew close by it, 
and very nearly carried it off. 

“If everybody minded their own business,” 
said the Duchess in a hoarse growl, “the world 
would go round a deal faster than it does.” 

“Which would not be an advantage,” said 
Alice, who felt very glad to get an opportunity 
of showing off a little of her knowledge. “Just 
think what work it would make with the day 
and night! You see the earth takes twenty- 
four hours to turn round on its axis ” 

“Talking of axes,” said the Duchess, “chop 
off her head!” 

Alice glanced rather anxiously at the cook, 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


cook was busily stirring the soup, and seemed > 
not to be listening, so she went on again:/ 
“Twenty-four hours, I think ; or is it twelve ?\ 
I ” 

“Oh, don’t bother me” said the Duchess; “I 
never could abide figures.” And with that 
she began nursing her child again, singing a 
sort of lullaby to it as she did so, and giving it 
a violent shake at the end of every line: 

“Speak roughly to your little boy, 

And beat him when he sneezes; 

He only does it to annoy, 

Because he knows it teases.” 

Chorus 

(in which the cook and the baby joined): 

“Wow? wow! wow!” 

While the duchess sang the second verse o 
the song, she kept tossing the baby violently 
up and down, and the poor little thing howled 
so, that Alice could hardly hear the words: 

“I speak severely to my boy, 

I beat him when he sneezes; 

[ 72 ] 


% 



For he can thoroughly enjoy 
The pepper when he pleases!” 

Chorus 

“Wow? wow! wow!” 

“Here! you may nurse it a bit, if you like!” 
said the Duchess to Alice, flinging the baby 
at her as she spoke. “I must go and get ready 
to play croquet with the Queen,” and she hur- 
ried out of the room. The cook threw a fry- 
ingpan after her as she went, but it just missed 
her. 

Alice caught the baby with some difficulty, 
as it was a queer-shaped little creature, and 
held out its arms and legs in all directions, 
“just like a star-fish,” thought Alice. The 
poor little thing was snorting like a steam en- 
gine when she caught it, and kept doubling it- 
self up and straightening itself out again, so 
that altogether, for the first minute or two, it 
was as much as she could do to hold it. 

As soon as she had made out the proper way 
of nursing it (which was to twist it up into a 
sort of knot, and then keep tight hold of its 
[ 73 ] 




ALICES ADVENTURES 


right ear and left foot, so as to prevent its 
undoing itself) , she carried it out into the open 
air. “If I don’t take this child away with me,” 
thought Alice, “they’re sure to kill it in a day 
or two: wouldn’t it be murder to leave it be- 
hind?” She said the last words out loud, and 
the little thing grunted in reply (it had left 
off sneezing by this time). “Don’t grunt,” 
said Alice: “that’s not at all a proper way of 
expressing yourself.” 

The baby grunted again, and Alice looked 
very anxiously into its face to see what was 
the matter with it. There could be no doubt 
that it had a very turn-up nose, much more 
like a snout than a real nose ; also its eyes were 
getting extremely small, for a baby: altogether 
Alice did not like the look of the thing at all. 
‘But perhaps it was only sobbing,” she 
\ thought, and looked into its eyes again, to see 
\if there were any tears. 

No, there were no tears. “If you’re going 
fo turn into a pig, my dear,” said Alice, seri- 
ously, “I’ll have nothing more to do with you. 
[ 74 ] 


























IN WONDERLAND 


Mind now!” The poor little thing sobbed 
again (or grunted, it was impossible to say 
which), and they went on for some while in 
silence. 

Alice was just beginning to think to herself, 
“Now, what am I to do with this creature when 
I get it home?” when it grunted again, so 
violently, that she looked down in its face in 
some alarm. This time there could be 
no mistake about it: it was neither more nor 
less than a pig, and she felt that it would 
be quite absurd for her to carry it any 
further. 

So she set the little creature down, and felt 
quite relieved to see it trot away quietly into 
the wood. “If it had grown up,” she said to 
herself, “it would have been a dreadfully ugly 
: but it makes rather a handsome pig, I 
think.” And she began thinking over other 
children she knew, who might do very well as 
pigs, and was just saying to herself, “If one 
only knew the right way to change them — — ’ 
when she was a little startled by seeing the 






ALICES ADVENTURES 

Cheshire Cat sitting on a bough of a tree a 
few yards off. 

The Cat only grinned when it saw Alice. It 
looked good-natured, she thought; still it had 
very long claws and a great many teeth, so she 
felt it ought to be treated with respect. 

“Cheshire Puss,” she began, rather timidly, 
as she did not at all know whether it would 
like the name : however, it only grinned a little 
wider. “Come, it’s pleased so far,” thought 
Alice, and she went on, “Would you tell me, 
please, which way I ought to walk from 
here?” 

“That depends a good deal on where you 
want to get to,” said the Cat. 

“I don’t much care where ” said Alice. 

“Then it doesn’t matter which way you 
walk,” said the Cat. 

— so long as I get somewhere ” Alice 
ydded as an explanation. 

‘Oh, you’re sure to do that,” said the Cat, 
(‘if you only walk long enough.” 

Alice felt that this could not be denied, so 
[ 76 ] 







IN WONDERLAND 


she tried another question. “What sort of peo- 
ple live about here?” 

“In that direction, the Cat said, waving its 
right paw round, “lives a Hatter; and in that 
direction,” waving the other paw, “lives a 
March Hare. Visit either you like; they’re 
both mad.” 

“But I don’t want to go among mad peo- 
ple,” Alice remarked. 

“Oh, you can’t help that,” said the Cat; 
“we’re all mad here. I’m mad. “You’re 
mad.” 

“How do you know I’m mad?” said Alice. 

“You must be,” said the Cat, “or you 
wouldn’t have come here.” 

Alice didn’t think that proved it at all ; how- 
ever, she went on: “and how do you know that 
^you’re mad?” 

“To begin with,” said the Cat, “a dog’s not 
mad. You grant that?” 

“I suppose so,” said Alice. 

“Well, then,” the Cat went on, “y ou see a 
dog growls when it’s angry, and wags its tail 
[ 77 ] 










ALICES ADVENTURES 


when it’s pleased. Now I growl when I’m 
pleased, and wag my tail when I’m angry. 
Therefore I’m mad.” 

“I call it purring, not growling,” said Alice. 

“Call it what you like,” said the Cat. “Do 
you play croquet with the Queen to-day?” 

“I should like it very much,” said Alice, “but 
I haven’t been invited yet.” 

“You’ll see me there,” said the Cat and van- 
ished. 

Alice was not much surprised at this, she 
was getting so well used to queer things hap- 
pening. While she was still looking at the 
place where it had been, it suddenly appeared 
again. 

“By-the-by, what became of the baby?” said 
the Cat. “I’d nearly forgotten to ask.” 

“It turned into a pig,” Alice answered very 
quietly, just as if the Cat had come back in a 
natural way. 

“I thought it would,” said the Cat, and van- 
again. 

Alice waited a little, half expecting to see 

[ 78 ] 







it again, but it did not appear, and after a 
minute or two she walked on in the direction 
in which the March Hare was said to live. 
“IVe seen Hatters before,” she said to herself; 
the March Hare will be much the most inter- 
esting, and perhaps as this is May it won’t be 
raving mad — at least not so mad as it was in 
March.” As she said this, she looked up, and 
there was the Cat again, sitting on a branch 
of a tree. 

“Did you say pig, or fig?” said the Cat. 

“I said pig,” replied Alice; “and I wish you 
wouldn’t keep appearing and vanishing so sud- 
denly; you make one quite giddy.” 

“All right,” said the Cat; and this time 
vanished quite slowly, beginning with the end 
of the tail, and ending with the grin, which re- 
mained some time after the rest of it had gone. 

“Well, I’ve often seen a cat without a grin,” 
thought Alice; “but a grin without a cat! It’s 
the most curious thing I ever saw in all my 
life!” 

She had not gone much farther before she 




came in sight of the house of the March Hare : 
she thought it must be the right house, be- 
cause the chimneys were shaped like ears and 
the roof was thatched with fur. It was so 
large a house, that she did not like to go nearer 
till she had nibbled some more of the left-hand 
bit of mushroom, and raised herself to about 
two feet high: even then she walked up to- 
ward it rather timidly, saying to herself, “Sup- 
pose it should be raving mad after all, I al- 
most wish I’d gone to see the Hatter instead.” 








A MAD TEA-PARTY. 

T HERE was a table set out under a tree 
in front of the house, and the March 
Hare and the Hatter were having tea 
at it: a Dormouse was sitting between them, 
fast asleep, and the other two were using it as a 
cushion, resting their elbows on it, and talking 
over its head. “Very uncomfortable for the 
Dormouse,” thought Alice: “only as it’s asleep, 
I suppose it doesn’t mind.” 

The table was a large one, but the three were 
all crowded together at one corner of it: “No 
room! No room?” they cried out when they 
saw Alice coming. “There’s plenty of room,” 
said Alice indignantly, and she sat down in a 
large arm-chair at one end of the table. 

“Have some wine,” the March Hare said in 




ALICES ADVENTURES 



Alice looked all round the table, but there 
was nothing on it but tea. • “I don’t see any 
wine,” she remarked. 

“There isn’t any,” said the March Hare. 

“Then it wasn’t very civil of you to offer it,” 
said Alice, angrily. 

“It wasn’t very civil of you to sit down with- 
out being invited,” said the March Hare. 

“I didn’t know it was your table,” said 
Alice; “it’s laid for a great many more than 
three.” 

“Your hair wants cutting,” said the Hatter. 
He had been looking at Alice for some time 
with great curiosity, and this was his first 
speech. 

“You should learn not to make personal re- 
marks,” Alice said with some severity: “it’s 
very rude.” 

The Hatter opened his eyes very wide on 
hearing this; but all he said was, “Why is a 
aven like a writing-desk?” 

'Come, we shall have some fun now!” 
thought Alice. “I’m glad they’ve begun ask- 
[ 82 ] 





ing riddles — I believe I can guess that,” she 
added aloud. 

“Do you mean that you think you can find 
out the answer to it?” said the March Hare. 
“Exactly so,” said Alice. 

“Then you should say what you mean,” the 
March Hare went on. 

“I do,” Alice hastily replied; “at least — at 
least I mean what I say — that’s the same thing, 
you know.” 

“Not the same thing a bit!” said the Hat- 
ter. “Why, you might just as well say that 
T see what I eat’ is the same thing as T eat 
what I see!’ ” 

“You might just as well say,” added 
March Hare, “that ‘I like what I get’ is the 
same thing as T get what I like!’ ” 

$T “You might just as well say,” added the 
Dormouse, who seemed to be talking in his 
sleep, “that T breathe when I sleep’ is the same 
thing as T sleep when I breathe!’ ” 

“It is the same thing with you,” said the 
Hatter, and here the conversation dropped, 



and the party sat silent for a minute, while 
Alice thought over all she could remember ! 
about ravens and writing-desks, which wasn’t \ 







tEfjen fje trippeb it 
into fns cup of tea. 


Page 84 





p' 



In WONDERLAND 


m 


kzju 


of tea, and looked at it again: but he could 
think of nothing better to say than his first re- 
mark, “it was the best butter, you know.” 

Alice had been looking over his shoulder 
with some curiosity. “What a funny watch!” 
she remarked. “It tells the day of the month, 
and doesn’t tell what o’clock it is!” 

“Why should it,” muttered the Hatter. 

“Does your watch tell you what year it 
is?” 

“Of course not,” Alice replied very readily: 
“but that’s because it stays the same year for 
such a long time together.” 

“Which is just the case with mine ” said the 
Hatter. 

Alice felt dreadfully puzzled. The Hat- 
ter’s remark seemed to her to have no sort of 
meaning in it, and yet it was certainly Eng- 
lish. “I don’t quite understand you,” she said, 
as politely as she could. 

“The Dormouse is asleep again,” said the 
Hatter, and he poured a little hot tea onto its 
nose. 

[ 85 ] 





ALICES ADVENTURES 


The Dormouse shook his head impatiently, 
and said, without opening his eyes, “Of course,/ 
of course: just what I was going to remarks 
myself.” 

“Have you guessed the riddle yet?” the Hat- 
ter said, turning to Alice again. 

“No, I give it up,” Alice replied: “what’s 
the answer?” 

“I haven’t the slightest idea,” said the Hat- 
ter. 

“Nor I,” said the March Hare. 

Alice sighed wearily. “I think you might 
do something better with the time,” she said, 
“than wasting it in asking riddles that have no 
answers.” 

“If you knew Time as well as I do,” said the 
Hatter, “you wouldn’t talk about wasting it.' 
It’s him ” 

“I don’t know what you mean,” said Alice. 
“Of course you don’t!” the Hatter said, toss- 
ing his head contemptuously. “I dare say you 
^ never even spoke to Time!” 

“Perhaps not,” Alice cautiously replied: 

[ 36 ] 








IN WONDERLAND 


‘‘but I know I have to beat time when I learn 
music.” 

“Ah! that accounts for it,” said the Hatter. 
“He won’t stand beating. Now, if you only 
kept on good terms with him, he’d do almost 
anything you liked with the clock. For in- 
stance, suppose it were nine o’clock in the 
morning, just time to begin lessons: you’d only 
have to whisper a hint to Time, and round goes 
the clock in a twinkling! Half-past one, time 
for dinner!” 

(“I only wish it was,” the March Hare said 
to itself in a whisper.) 

“That would be grand, certainly,” said Alice 
thoughtfully: “but then — I shouldn’t be hun 
gry for it, you know.” 

“Not at first, perhaps,” said the Hatter: 
“but you could keep it to half -past one as long 
as you liked.” 

“Is that the way you manage?” Alice asked. 

The Hatter shook his head mournfully. 
“Not I,” he replied. “We quarrelled last March 
— just before lie went mad, you know” — 
[ 87 ] 






ALICES ADVENTURES 

(pointing with his teaspoon at the March 
Hare) — “it was at the great concert given by 
the Queen of Hearts, and I had to sing. 

“ ‘Twinkle, twinkle, little bat? 

How I wonder what you’re at?’ 

You know the song perhaps?” 

“I’ve heard something like it,” said Alice. 
“It goes on, you know,” the Hatter con- 
tinued, “in this way: 

‘“Up above the world you fly, 

Like a teatray in the sky. 

Twinkle, twinkle ’ ” 

Here the Dormouse shook itself, and began 
singing in its sleep, " twinkle , twinkle _, twinkle , 

twinkle ■" and went on so long that they 

had to pinch it to make it stop. 

“Well, I’d hardly finished the first verse,” 
said the Hatter, “when the Queen bawled out 
‘He’s murdering the time ! Off with his head ! ’ ” 
“How dreadfully savage!” exclaimed Alice. 
“And ever since that,” the Hatter went on 


< 



IN WONDERLAND 


in a mournful tone, “he won’t do a thing I 
ask! It’s always six o’clock now.” 

A bright idea came into Alice’s head. “Is 
that the reason so many tea-things are put out 
here?” she asked. 

“Yes, that’s it,” said the Hatter with a sigh: 
“it’s always tea-time, and we’ve no time to 
wash the things between whiles.” 

“Then you keep moving round, I suppose?” 
said Alice. 

“Exactly so,” said the Hatter: “as the 
things get used up.” 

“But when you come to the beginning 
again?” Alice ventured to ask. 

“Suppose we change the subject,” the 
March Hare interrupted, yawning. “I’m 
getting tired of this. I vote the young lady 
tell us a story.” 

“I’m afraid I don’t know one,” said Alice, 
rather alarmed at the proposal. 

“Then the Dormouse shall!” they both cried. 
“Wake up, Dormouse!” And they pinched it 
on both sides at once. 

[ 89 ] 








ALICES ADVENTURES 


The Dormouse slowly opened his eyes. “I 
wasn’t asleep,” he said in a hoarse, feeble voice: j 
“I heard every word you fellows were saying . 5 

“Tell us a story!” said the March Hare. 

“Yes, please do!” pleaded Alice. 

“And be quick about it,” added the Hat- 
ter, “or you’ll be asleep again before it’s done.” 

“Once upon a time there were three little 
sisters,” the Dormouse began in a great hurry; 
“and their names were Elsie, Lacie and Tillie; 
and they lived at the bottom of a well ” 

“What did they live on?” said Alice, who 
always took a great interest in questions of 
eating and drinking. 

“They lived on treacle,” said the Dormouse, 
after thinking a minute or two. 

“They couldn’t have done that, you know,”'' 
Alice gently remarked: “they’d have been ill .’ 5 

“So they were,” said the Dormouse, “very 
ill.” 

y Alice tried a little to fancy to herself what 
\such an extraordinary way of living would be 
like, but it puzzled her too much, so she went 
[ 90 ] 


< 




bSii^ 


IN WONDERLAND 


on: “But why did they live at the bottom of 
a well?” 

“Take some more tea,” the March Hare said 
to Alice, very earnestly. 

“IVe had nothing yet,” Alice replied in an 
offended tone, “so I can’t take more.” 

“You mean, you can’t take less” said the 
Hatter: “it’s very easy to take more than 
nothing.” 

“Nobody asked your opinion,” said Alice. 

“Who’s making personal remarks now?” the 
Hatter asked triumphantly. 

Alice did not quite know what to say to 
this: so she helped herself to some tea and 
bread-and-butter, and then turned to the Dor- 
mouse, and repeated her question. “Why did 
they live at the bottom of a well?” 

The Dormouse again took a minute or two 
to think about it, and then said, “It was a 
treacle- well.” 

“There’s no such thing!” Alice was begin- 
ning very angrily, but the Hatter and the 
March Hare went “Sh! sh!” and the Dormouse 
[ 91 ] 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


sulkily remarked, “If you can’t be civil, you’d 
better finish the story for yourself.” 

“No, please go on!” Alice said very humbly: 
“I won’t interrupt you again. I dare say there 
may be one ” 

“One, indeed!” said the Dormouse indig- 
nantly. However, he consented to go on. 
“And so these three sisters — they were learn- 
ing to draw, you know ” 

“What did they draw?” said Alice, quite 
forgetting her promise. 

“Treacle,” said the Dormouse, without con- 
sidering at all this time. 

“I want a clean cup,” interrupted the Hat- 
ter: “let’s all move one place on.” 

He moved on as he spoke, and the Dormouse 
followed him: the March Hare moved into the*! 
Dormouse’s place, and Alice rather unwilling- 
ly took the place of the March Hare. The 
Hatter was the only one who got any advan- 
tage from the change: and Alice was a good 
f^deal worse off than before, as the March Hare 
had just upset the milk- jug into his plate. 

[ 92 ] 






again, so she began very cautiously: “But I 
don’t understand. Where did they draw the 
treacle from?” 

“You can draw water out of a water-well,” 
said the Hatter; “so I think you could draw 
treacle out of a treacle-well — eh, stupid?” 

“But they were in the well,” Alice said to 
the Dormouse, not choosing to notice this last 
remark. 

“Of course they were,” said the Dormouse— 
“well in.” 

This answer so confused poor Alice, that 
she let the Dormouse go on for some time with- 
out interrupting it. 

“They were learning to draw,” the Dor- 
mouse went on, yawning and rubbing its eyes, 
'for it was getting very sleepy; “and they drew 
all manner of things — everything that begins 
with an M ” 


“Why with an M?” said Alice. 
“Why not?” said the March Hare. 





ALICES ADVENTURES 


The Dormouse had closed its eyes by this 
time, and was going off into a dose, but, on 
being pinched by the Hatter, it woke up again 
with a little shriek, and went on : “That begins 
with an M, such as mousetraps, and the moon, 
and memory, and muchness — you know you 
say things are ‘much of a muchness’ — did you 
ever see such a thing as a drawing of a much- 
ness?” 

“Really, now you ask me,” said Alice, very 
much confused, “I don’t think ” 

“Then you shouldn’t talk,” said the Hatter. 

This piece of rudeness was more than Alice 
could bear: she got up in great disgust, and 
walked off: the Dormouse fell asleep instant- 
ly, and neither of the others took the least 
notice of her going, though she looked back 
once or twice, half hoping that they would 
i call after her : the last time she saw them, they 
^were trying to put the Dormouse into the tea- 
pot. 

‘At any rate I’ll never go there again!” said 
Alice as she picked her way through the wood. 

[ 94 ] 




sQ 


It’s the stupidest tea-party I was ever at in 
all my life!” 

Just as she said this, she noticed that one 
of the trees had a door leading right into it. 
“That’s very curious!” she thought. “But 
everything’s curious to-day. I think I may 
as well go in at once.” And in she went. 

Once more she found herself in a long hall, 
and close to the little glass table. “Now I’ll 
manage better this time,” she said to herself, 
and began by taking the little golden key, and 
unlocking the door that led into the garden. 
Then she set to work nibbling at the mush- 
room (she had kept a piece of it in her pocket) 
till she was about a foot high: then she walked 
down the little passage then — she found her- 
self at last in a beautiful garden, among the 
bright flower-beds and the cool fountains. 



THE QUEEN S CROQUET-GROUND. 

A LARGE rose-tree stood near the 
entrance of the garden: the roses 
growing on it were white, but 
there were three gardeners at it, busily paint- 
ing them red. Alice thought this a very 
curious thing, and she went nearer to watch 
them, and just as she came up to them 
she heard one of them say, “Look out now, 
Five! Don’t go splashing paint over me like 
that!” 

“I couldn’t help it,” said Five in a sul 
tone; “Seven jogged my elbow.” 

On which Seven looked up and said, “That’s 
right, Five! Always lay the blame on others!” 

“Youd better not talk!” said Five. “I 
.heard the Queen say only yesterday you de- 
served to be beheaded.” 

[ 96 ] 










IN WONDERLAND 


What for?'’ said the one who had spoken 
first. 

“That’s none of your business, Two!” said 
Seven. 

“Yes, it is his business!” said Five, “and I’ll 
tell him — it was for bringing the cook tulip- 
roots instead of onions.” 

Seven flung down the brush, and had just 

begun, “Well, of all the unjust things ” 

when his eye chanced to fall upon Alice, as 
she stood watching them, and he checked him- 
self suddenly; the others looked round also, 
and all of them bowed low. 

“Would you tell me, please,” said Alice, a 
little timidly, “why you are painting 
roses?” 

Five and Seven said nothing, but looked at 
Two. Two began, in a low voice, “Why, the 
fact is, you see, miss, this here ought to have 
been a red rose-tree, and we put a white one in 
by mistake, and if the Queen was to find it 
out, we should all have our heads cut off, you 





ALICES ADVENTURES 


afore she comes, to ” At this moment Five, 

who had been anxiously looking across the gar- j 
den, called out, “The Queen! the Queen!” and 
the three gardeners instantly threw themselves 
flat upon their faces. There was a sound of 
many footsteps, and Alice looked round, eager 
to see the Queen. 

First came ten soldiers carrying clubs ; these 
were all shaped like the three gardeners, 
oblong and flat, with their hands and feet at 
the corners; next the ten courtiers; these were 
ornamented all over with diamonds, and 
w T alked two and two, as the soldiers did. After 
these came the royal children; there were ten 
of them, and the little dears came jumping 
merrily along hand in hand, in couples; they 
were all ornamented with hearts. Next came 
the guests, mostly Kings and Queens, and,; 
among them Alice recognized the White Rab- 
;; it was talking in a hurried nervous man- 
ler, smiling at everything that was said, and 
Went by without noticing her. Then followed 
the Knave of Hearts, carrying the King’s 
[ 98 ] 


















































































. 

: 













. 






t 




. 





























. 














































4 “ 




Xfts 

OVk' 




crown on a crimson velvet cushion; and, last 
of all this grand procession, came THE 
KING AND QUEEN OF HEARTS. 

Alice was rather doubtful whether she ought 
to lie down on her face like the three gar- 
deners, but she could not remember ever hav- 
ing heard of such a rule at processions; “and 
what would be the use of a proces- 
sion,” she thought, “if people had all to lie 
down on their faces, so that they couldn’t see 
it?” So she stood where she was and waited. 

When the procession came opposite to Alice, 
they all stopped and looked at her, and the 
Queen said severely, “Who is this?” She said 
it to Knave of Hearts, who only bowed and 
smiled in reply. 

“Idiot,” said the Queen, tossing her head 
impatiently; and, turning to Alice she went on, 
“What’s your name, child?” 

“My name is Alice, so please your majesty,” 
said Alice very politely; but she added, to her- 
self, “Why they’re only a pack of cards, after 
all. I needn’t be afraid of them.” 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


“And who are these?” said the queen, point- 
ing to the three gardeners who were lying 
round the rose-tree; for you see, as they were 
lying on their faces, and the pattern on their 
backs was the same as the rest of the pack, she 
could not tell whether they were gardeners, or 
soldiers, or courtiers. 

“How should I know?” said Alice, surprised 
at her own courage. “It’s no business of 
mine” 

The Queen turned crimson with fury, and, 
after glaring at her for a moment like a wild 
beast, began screaming, “Off with her head! 
Off ” 

“Nonsense!” said Alice, very loudly and de- 
cidedly, and the Queen was silent. 

The King laid his hand upon her arm, and 
timidly said, “Consider, my dear: she is only 
!\a child!” 

The Queen turned angrily away from him, 
ind said to the Knave, “Turn them over!” 

I The Knave did so, very carefully, with one 
foot. 

[ 100 ] 



“|9ou shan’t tie kfjeabeb.” 


Page jo i 
























' 











































. 





















IN WONDERLAND 


“Get up!” said the Queen in a shrill, loud 
voice, and the three gardeners instantly 
jumped up, and began bowing to the King, 
the Queen, the royal children, and everybody 
else. 

I “Leave off that!” screamed the Queen. “You 
make me giddy.” And then, turning to the 
. rose-tree, she went on, “What have you been 
doing here?” 

“May it please your majesty,” said Two, in 
a very humble tone, going down on one knee 
as he spoke, “we were trying ” 

“I see!” said the Queen, who had meanwhile 
been examining the roses. “Off with their 
heads!” and the procession moved on, three of 
the soldiers remaining behind to execute the 
unfortunate gardeners, who ran to Alice for 
protection. 

“You shan’t be beheaded!” said Alice, and 
she put them into a large flower-pot that stood 
near. The three soldiers wandered about for 
a minute or two, looking for them, and then 
quietly marched off after the others. 

[ 101 ] 



ALICE'S ADVENTURES 



“Are their heads off?” shouted the Queen. 

“Their heads are gone, if it please your ma- 
jesty!” the soldiers shouted in reply. 

“That’s right!” shouted the Queen. “Can 
you play croquet?” 

The soldiers were silent, and looked at Alice, 
as the question was evidently meant for her. 

“Yes!” shouted Alice. 

“Come on then!” roared the Queen, and 
Alice joined the procession, wondering very 
much what would happen next. 

“It’s — it’s a very fine day!” said a timid 
voice at her side. She was walking by the 
White Rabbit, who was peeping anxiously into 
her face. 

“Very,” said Alice: “where’s the Duchess?” 

“Hush! Hush!” said the Rabbit in a low, 
hurried tone. He looked anxiously over his < 
shoulder as he spoke, and then raised himself 
lpon tiptoe, put his mouth close to her ear, and 
[' whispered, “She’s under sentence of execu- 
tion.” 

‘What for?” said Alice. 

[ 102 1 







IN WONDERLAND 


“Did you say, ‘What a pity!’ ” the Rabbit 
asked. 

“No, I didn’t,” said Alice: “I don’t think 
it’s at all a pity. I said ‘What for?’ ” 

“She boxed the Queen’s ears ” the Rab- 

bit began. Alice gave a little scream of 
laughter. “Oh hush!” the Rabbit whispered 
in a frightened tone. “The Queen will hear 
you! You see she came rather late, and the 
Queen said ” 


“Get to your places!” shouted the Queen in 
a voice of thunder, and people began running 
about in all directions, tumbling up against 
each other: however, they got settled down in 
a minute or two, and the game began. 

Alice thought she had never seen such a 
croquet-ground in her life: it was all 
ridges and furrows ; the croquet-balls were live 
hedgehogs, and the mallets live flamingoes, 
and the soldiers had to double themselves up 
and stand on their hands and feet, to make the 
arches. 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


in managing her flamingo; she succeeded in 
getting its body tucked away, comfortably 
enough, under her arm, with its legs hanging 
down, but generally, just as she had got its 
neck nicely straightened out, and was going to 
give the hedgehog a blow with its head, it 
would twist itself round and look up into her 
face, with such a puzzled expression that she 
could not help bursting out laughing: and 
when she had got its head down, and was going 
to begin again, it was very provoking to find 
that the hedgehog had unrolled itself, and was 
in the act of crawling away: besides all this, 
there was generally a ridge or a furrow in the 
way wherever she wanted to send the hedge- 
hog to, and, as the doubled-up soldiers were al- 
ways getting up and walking off to other parts 
of the ground, Alice soon came to the con- 
clusion that it was a very difficult game in- 
eed. 

¥ The players all played at once without wait- 
ing for turns, quarreling all the while, and 
fighting for the hedgehogs; and in a very short 
[ 104 ] 






IN WONDERLAND 


time the Queen was in a furious passion, and 
went stamping about, and shouting, “Off with 
his head!” or “Off with her head!” about once 
in a minute. 

Alice began to feel very uneasy; to be sure, 
she had not as yet had any dispute with the 
Queen, but she knew that it might happen any 
minute, “and then,” thought she, “what would 
become of me? They’re dreadfully fond of be- 
heading people here : the great wonder is, that 
there’s any one left alive!” 

She was looking about for some way of es- 
cape, and wondering whether she could get 
away without being seen, when she noticed a 
curious appearance in the air: it puzzled her 
very much at first, but after watching it a 
or two she made it out to be a grin, and 
she said to herself, “It’s the Cheshire Cat: now 
I shall have somebody to talk to.” 

“How are you getting on?” said the Cat, as 
soon as there was mouth enough for it to speak 
with. 

Alice waited till the eyes appeared, and then 
[ 105 ] 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


nodded. “It’s no use speaking to it,” she 
thought, “till its ears have come, or at least one 
of them.” In another minute the whole head) 
appeared, and then Alice put down her 
flamingo, and began an account of the game, 
feeling very glad she had some one to listen to 
her. The cat seemed to think that there was 
enough of it now in sight, and no more 
of it appeared. 

“I don’t think they play at all fairly,” Alice 
began, in rather a complaining tone, “and they 
all quarrel so dreadfully, one can’t hear one- 
self speak — and they don’t seem to have any 
rules in particular; at least, if there are, no- 
body attends to them — and you’ve no idea how 
confusing it is all the things being alive; for 
instance, there’s the arch I’ve got to go through' 
next walking about at the other end of the^ 
ground — and I should have croqueted the 
Queen’s hedgehog just now, only it ran away 
when it saw mine coming!” 

“How do you like the Queen?” said the Cat 
in a low voice. 

[ 106 ] 




J ust then she noticed that the Queen 
was close behind her, listening ; so she went on, 
“Likely to win, that it’s hardly worth while 
finishing the game.” 

The Queen smiled and passed on. 

“Who are you talking to?” said the King, 
coming up to Alice, and looking at the Cat’s 
head with great curiosity. 

“It’s a friend of mine — a Cheshire Cat,” said 
Alice; “allow me to introduce it.” 

“I don’t like the look of it at all,” said the 
King; “it may kiss my hand if it likes.” 

“I’d rather not,” the Cat remarked. 

“Don’t be impertinent,” said the King, “and 
don’t look at me like that!” He got behind 
Alice as he spoke. 

A cat may look at a king,” said Alice. “I’ve- 
read that in some book, but I don’t remember 
where.” 

“Well, it must be removed,” said the 
King very decidedly, and he called to 






ALICE'S ADVENTURES 


“My dear! I wish you would have this 
cat removed!” 

The Queen had only one way of settling 
all difficulties, great or small. “Off with 
his head!” she said without even looking 
round. 

“I’ll fetch the executioner myself,” said the 
King eagerly, and he hurried off. 

Alice thought she might as well go back and 
see how the game was going on, as she heard 
the Queen’s voice in the distance, screaming 
with passion. She had already heard her sen- 
tence three of the players to be executed for 
having missed their turns, and she did not like 
the look of things at all, as the game was in 
such confusion that she never knew whether it 
was her turn or not. So she went off in search 
of her hedgehog. 

The hedgehog was engaged in a fight with 
hedgehog, which seemed to Alice an 
excellent opportunity for croqueting one of 
with the other; the only difficulty was, 
that her flamingo was gone across to the other 
[ 108 ] 






IH WONDERLAND 


side of the garden, where Alice could see it 
trying in a helpless sort of way to fly up into 
a tree. 

By the time she had caught the flamingo and 
brought it back, the fight was over, and both 
the hedgehogs were out of sight; “but it 
doesn’t matter much,” thought Alice, “as all 
the arches are gone from this side of the < 
ground.” So she tucked it away under her 
arm, that it might not escape again, and went 
back to have a little more conversation with 
her friend. 

When she got back to the Cheshire Cat, she 
was surprised to find quite a large crowd col- 
lected round it; there was a dispute going on/ 
between the executioner, the King and the' 
Queen, who were all talking at once, while all 
the rest were quite silent, and looked very un- 
comfortable. 

The moment Alice appeared, she was ap- 
pealed to by all thre^ * ettle the question, and 
they repeated their ments to her, though, 
as they all spoke ?e, she found it very 

•”] 


rgSmm 




ALICES ADVENTURES 


hard to make out exactly what they 
said. 


The executioner’s argument was, that you 
couldn’t cut off a head unless there was a body 
to cut it off from; that he had never had to do 
such a thing before, and he wasn’t going to 
begin at his time of life. 

The King’s argument was, that anything 
that had a head could be beheaded, and that 
you weren’t to talk nonsense. 

The Queen’s argument was, that if some- 
thing wasn’t done about it in less than no time, 
she’d have everybody executed, all round. (It 
was this last remark that had made the whole 
party look so grave and anxious.) 

Alice could think of nothing else to say but 
“It belongs to the Duchess: you’d better ask 
her about it.” 

“She’s in prison,” the Queen said to the 
.executioner: “Fetch her here.” And the exe- 
cutioner went off like an arrow. 

The Cat’s head began fading away the mo- 
ment he was gone, and, by the time he had 
[ 110 ] 



come back with the Duchess, it had entirely 
disappeared; so the King and the executioner 
ran wildly up and down looking for it, while 
. the rest of the party went back to the game. 





ALICES ADVENTURES 


THE MOCK TURTLE S STORY, 


Y 


OU can’t think how glad I am to 
see you again, you dear old 
thing,” said the Duchess, as she 
tucked her arm affectionately into Alice’s and 
they walked off together. 

Alice was very glad to find her in such a 
pleasant temper, and thought to herself that 
perhaps it was only the pepper that had made 
her so savage when they met in the kitchen. 
“When Tin a Duchess, she said to herself (not 
in a very hopeful tone though) , “I won’t have 
any pepper in my kitchen at all . Soup does 
very well without. Maybe it’s always pepper 
that makes people hot-tempered,” she went on, 
much pleased at having found out a new 
of rule, “and vinegar that makes them 
camomile that makes them bitter — 
and — barley-sugar and such things that make 





IN WONDERLAND 


children sweet-tempered. I only wish people 
knew that ; then they wouldn’t be so stingy 
about it, you know ” 

She had quite forgotten the Duchess by this 
time, and was a little startled when she heard 
her voice close to her ear. “You’re thinking 
about something my dear, and that makes you 
forget to talk. I can’t tell you just now what 
the moral of that is, but I shall remember it in 
a bit.” 

“Perhaps it hasn’t one,” Alice ventured to 
remark. 

“Tut, tut, child!” said the Duchess. “Every- 
thing’s got a moral, if only you can find it.” 
And she squeezed herself up closer to Alice’s 
side as she spoke. 

Alice did not much like her keeping so close 
to her; first, because the Duchess was very 
ugly, and secondly, because she was exactly 
the right height to rest her chin on Alice’s 
shoulder, and it was an uncomfortably sharp 
chin. However, she did not like to be rude, 
so she bore it as well as she could. 

[ 113 ] 




ALICES ADVENTURES 


“The game’s going on rather better now,” 
she said by way of keeping up the conversation 
a little. 

“ ’Tis so,” said the Duchess; “and the moral 
of that is — ‘Oh, ’tis love, ’tis love, that makes 
the world go round!’ ” 

“Somebody said,” Alice whispered, “that 
it’s done by everybody minding their own busi- 
ness!” 

“Ah, well! It means much the same thing,” 
said the Duchess, digging her sharp little chin 
into Alice’s shoulder as she added, “and 
the moral of that is — ‘Take care of the 
sense, and the sounds will take care of them- 
selves.’ ” 

“How fond she is of finding morals in 
things!” Alice thought to herself. 

“I daresay you’re wondering why I don’t 
put my arm round your waist,” said the Duch- 
^ess after a pause; “the reason is, that I’m 
f doubtful about the temper of your flamingo. 
\ Shall I try the experiment?” 

“He might bite,” Alice cautiously replied, 
[ 114 ] 



IN WONDERLAND 


not feeling at all anxious to have the experi- 
ment tried. 

“Very true,” said the Duchess; “flamingoes 
and mustard both bite. And the moral of that 
is — ‘Birds of a feather flock together.’ ” 

“Only mustard isn’t a bird,” Alice remarked. 

“Right, as usual,” said the Duchess; “what 
a clear way you have of putting things!” 

“It’s a mineral, I think ” said Alice. 

“Of course it is,” said the Duchess, who 
seemed ready to agree to everything that Alice 
said; “there’s a large mustard-mine near here. 
And the moral of that is — ‘The more there is 
of mine, the less there is of yours.’ ” 

“Oh, I know!” exclaimed Alice, who had( 
not attended to this last remark, “it’s a vege- 
table. It doesn’t look like one, but it is.” 

“I quite agree with you,” said the Duchess, 
and the moral of that is — ‘Be what you would 
seem to be’ — or, if you’d like it put more sim- 
ply — ‘Never imagine yourself not to be other- 
wise than what it might appear to others that 
what you were or might have been was not 
[ 115 ] 



ALICES ADVENTURES 



otherwise than w T hat you had been would have 
appeared to them to be otherwise.’ ” 

“I think I should understand that better, 5 : 
Alice said very politely, “if I had it written 
down; but I can’t follow it as you say it.” 

“That’s nothing to what I could say if I 
chose,” the Duchess replied in a pleased tone. 

“Pray don’t trouble yourself to say it any 
longer than that,” said Alice. 

“Oh, don’t talk about trouble!” said the 
Duchess. “I make you a present of every- 
thing I’ve said as yet.” 

“A cheap sort of present!” thought Alice. 
“I’m glad they don’t give birthday presents 
like that!” But she did not venture to say it 
out loud. 

“Thinking again?” the Duchess asked, with^ 
another dig of her sharp little chin. 

‘I’ve a right to think,” said Alice sharp-" 
ly, for she was beginning to feel a little wor- 
ried. 

‘Just about as much right,” said the Duch- 
ess, “as pigs have to fly; and the m ” 

[ 116 ] 







IH WONDERLAND 



But here, to Alice’s great surprise, the 
Duchess’ voice died away, even in the middle 
of her favorite word “moral,” and the arm that 
was linked into hers began to tremble. Alice 
looked up, and there stood the Queen in front 
of them, with her arms folded, frowning like a 
thunderstorm. 

“A fine day, your majesty!” the Duchess 
began in a low, weak voice. 

“Now, I give you fair warning,” shouted the 
Queen, stamping on the ground as she spoke; 
“either you or your head must be off, and that 
in about half no time! Take your choice!” 

The Duchess took her choice, and was gone 
in a moment. 

“Let’s go on with the game,” the Queen said 
to Alice, and Alice was too much frightened to 
say a word, but slowly followed her back to 
the croquet-ground. 

The other guests had taken advantage of 
the Queen’s absence, and were resting in the 
shade : however, the moment they saw her, they 
hurried back to the game, the Queen merely 
[ 117 ] 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


remarking that a moment’s delay would cost / 
them their lives. 

All the time they were playing the Queen \ 
never left off quarreling with the other play- 
ers, and shouting “Off with his head!” or “Off 
with her head!” Those whom she sentenced 
were taken into custody by the soldiers, who 
of course had to leave off being arches to do 
this, so that by the end of half an hour or so 
there were no arches left, and all the players, 
except the King, the Queen, and Alice, were 
in custody, and under sentence of execution. 

Then the Queen left off, quite out of breath, 
and said to Alice, “Have you seen the Mock 
Turtle yet?” 

“No,” said Alice, “I don’t even know what 
a Mock Turtle is.” 

“It’s the thing Mock Turtle soup is mad' 
from,” said the Queen. 

“I never saw one, or heard of one,” said 
Alice. 

“Come on, then,” said the Queen, “and he 
shall tell you his history.” 

[ 118 ] 




As they walked off together, Alice heard 
the King say in a low voice, to the company 
generally, “You are all pardoned.” “Come, 
that’s a good thing!” she said to herself, for 
she had felt quite unhappy at the number of 
executions the Queen had ordered. 

They very soon came upon a Gryphon, lying 
fast asleep in the sun (If you don’t know wha 
a Gryphon is, look at the picture.) “Up, lazy 
thing!” said the Queen, “and take this young 
lady to see the Mock Turtle, and to hear his 
history. I must go back and see after some 
executions I have ordered;” and she walked 
off, leaving Alice alone with the Gryphon. 
Alice did not quite like the look of the 
ture, but on the whole she thought it 
be quite as safe to stay with it as to go after 
that savage Queen: so she waited. 

The Gryphon sat up and rubbed his eyes; 
then it watched the Queen till she was out of 
sight: then it chuckled. “What fun!” said the 
Gryphon, half to itself, half to Alice. 

“What is the fun?” said Alice. 

[ 119 ] 





ALICES ADVENTURES 


“Why, she” said the Gryphon. “It’s all her 
fancy, that: they never executes nobody, you 
know. Come on!” 

“Everybody says ‘come on!’ here,” thought 
Alice, as she went slowly after it: “I never was 
so ordered about before in all my life; never!” 

They had not gone far before they saw the 
Mock Turtle in the distance, sitting sad and 
lonely on a little ledge of rock, and, as they 
came nearer, Alice could hear him sighing as 
if his heart would break. She pitied him deep- 
ly. “What is his sorrow?” she asked the 
Gryphon, and the Gryphon answered, very 
nearly in the same words as before, “It’s all 
his fancy, that: he hasn’t got no sorrow, you 
know. Come on!” 

So they went up to the Mock Turtle, who 
looked at them with large eyes full of tears, 
said nothing. 

“This here young lady,” said the Gryphon, 
she wants for to know your history, she 


“I’ll tell it her,” said the Mock Turtle in 



IN WONDERLAND 


a deep, hollow tone : “sit down both of you, and 
don’t speak a word till I’ve finished.” 

So they sat down, and nobody spoke for 
some minutes. Alice thought to herself, “I 
don’t see how he can ever finish, if he doesn’t 
begin.” But she waited patiently. 

“Once,” said the Mock Turtle, at last, with 
a deep sigh, “I was a real Turtle.” 

These words were followed by a very long 
silence, broken only by an occasional exclama- 
tion of “Hjckrrh!” from the Gryphon, and the 
constant heavy sighing of the Mock Turtle. 
Alice was very nearly getting up and saying, 
“Thank you, sir, for your interesting story, 
but she could not help thinking there must be! 
more to come, so she sat still and said nothing. ' 

“When we were little,” the Mock Turtle 
went on at last, more calmly, though still sob- 
bing a little now and then, “we went to school 
in the sea. The master was an old Turtle — • 
we used to call him Tortoise »” 

“Why do you call him Tortoise, if he wasn’t 
one?” Alice asked. 

[ 121 ] 









ALICES ADVENTURES 


“We called him Tortoise because he taught 
us,” said the Mock Turtle angrily; “really you 
are very dull!” 

“You ought to be ashamed of yourself for 
asking such a simple question,” added the 
Gryphon; and then they both sat silent and 
looked at poor Alice, who felt ready to sink 
into the earth. At last the Gryphon said to 
the Mock Turtle, “Drive on, old fellow! Don’t 
be all day about it!” and he went on in these 
words : 

“Yes, we went to school in the sea, though 
you mayn’t believe it ” 

“I never said I didn’t!” interrupted 
Alice. 

“You did,” said the Mock Turtle. 

“Hold your tongue!” added the Gryphon, 
before Alice could speak again. The Mock 
Turtle went on. 

“We had the best of educations — in fact, we 
went to school every day ” 

“Tve been to a day-school too,” said Alice; 
‘you needn’t be so proud as all that.” 

[ 122 ] 





“With extras?” asked the Mock Turtle a lit- 













The Gryphon lifted up both its paws in sur- 
prise. “Never heard of uglifying!” it ex- 
claimed. “You know what to beautify is, I 
suppose?” 

“Yes,” said Alice, doubtfully: “it means — - 
to — make — anything — prettier.” 

“Well, then,” the Gryphon went on, “if you 
don’t know what to uglify is, you are a sim- 
pleton.” 

Alice did not feel encouraged to ask any 
more questions about it, so she turned to the 
Mock Turtle, and said, “What else had you to 
learn?” 

“Well, there was Mystery,” the Mock Tur- 
tle replied, counting off the subjects on his 
flappers — “Mystery, ancient and modern, with 
Seaography: then Drawling — the Drawl- 
ing-master was an old conger-eel, that 
( used to come once a week : he taught 
\^us Drawling, Stretching and Fainting in 
:oils.” 

“What was that like?” said Alice. 

“Well, I can’t show it you, myself,” the 
[ 124 ] 






IN WONDERLAND 


Mock Turtle said: “I’m too stiff. And the 
Gryphon never learned it.” 

“Hadn’t time,” said the Gryphon: “I went 
to the Classical master, though. He was an old 
crab, lie was.” 

“I never went to him,” the Mock Turtle said 
with a sigh: “he taught Laughing and Grief, 
they used to say.” 

“So he did, so he did,” said the 
Gryphon, sighing in his turn, and both 
creatures hid their faces in their 
paws. 

“And how many hours a day did you do les- 
sons?” said Alice, in a hurry to change the 
subject. 

“Ten hours the first day,” said the Mock 
Turtle: “nine the next, and so on.” 

‘What a curious plan!” exclaimed Alice. 
‘That’s the reason they’re called lessons,” 
the Gryphon remarked: “because they lessen 
from day to day.” 

This was quite a new idea to Alice, and she 




ALICES ADVENTURES 


next remark. “Then the eleventh day must 
have been a holiday?’’ 

“Of course it was,” said the Mock Turtle. 

“And how did you manage on the twelfth?” 
Alice went on eagerly. 

“That’s enough about lessons,” the Gryphon 
interrupted in a very decided tone: “tell her 
something about the games now.” 


[ 126 ] 



THE LOBSTER QUADRILLE. 


T HE Mock Turtle sighed deeply, and 
drew the back of one flapper 
his eyes. He looked at Alice and 
tried to speak, but for a minute or two sobs 
choked his voice. “Same as if he had a bone 
in his throat,” said the Gryphon, and it set to 
work shaking him and punching him in the 
back. At last the Mock Turtle recovered his 
voice, and, with tears running down his 
he went on again: 

“You may not have lived much under the 
sea” — (“I haven’t,” said Alice) — “and per- 
haps you were not even introduced to a 
Lobster” — (Alice began to say “I once tasted 
— but checked herself to say “No, never”) — 
“so you can have no idea what a delightful 




ALICES ADVENTURES 


“No, indeed,” said Alice. “What sort of a 
dance is it?” 

“Why,” said the Gryphon, “you first form 

into a line along the seashore ” 

“Two lines!” cried the Mock Turtle. “Seals, 
turtles, salmon, and so on: then, when you’ve 

cleared all the jelly-fish out of the way ” 

“That generally takes some time,” inter- 
rupted the Gryphon. 

“You advance twice ” 

“Each with a lobster as a partner!” cried 
the Gryphon. 

“Of course,” the Mock Turtle said: “ad- 
vance twice, set to partners ” 

“Change lobsters, and retire in same order,” 
continued the Gryphon. 

“Then, you know,” the Mock Turtle went 

on, “you throw the ” 

‘The lobsters!” shouted the Gryphon, with 
\a bound into the air. 

“As far out to sea as you can ” 

“Swim after them!” screamed the Gry- 
phon. 

[ 128 ] 








“Turn a somersault in the sea!” cried the 
Mock Turtle, capering wildly about. 

“Change lobsters again!” yelled the Gry- 
phon at the top of its voice. 

“Back to land again, and — that’s all the first 
figure,” said the Mock Turtle, suddenly drop- 
ping his voice, and the two creatures, who had 
been jumping about like mad things all this 
time, sat down again very sadly and quietly, 
and looked at Alice. 

“It must be a very pretty dance,” said Alice 
timidly. 

“Would you like to see a little of it?” said 
the Mock Turtle. 

“Very much indeed,” said Alice. 

“Come, let’s try the first figure! said the 
Mock Turtle to the Gryphon. “We can do it 
without lobsters, you know. Which shall sing?” 

“Oh, you sing,” said the Gryphon. “I’ve 
forgotten the words.” 

So they* began solemnly dancing round and 
round Alice, every now; and then treading on 
her toes when they passed too close, and wav- 
[ 129 ] 






in g their forepaws to mark the time, while 
the Mock Turtle sang this, very slowly and 
sadly: 

“ ‘Will you walk a little faster!’ said a whiting to a snail, 
‘There’s a porpoise close behind us, and he’s treading on my 
tail. 

See how eagerly the lobsters and the turtles all advance! 

They are waiting on the shingle — will you come and join the 
dance? 

Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, will you join the 
dance? 

Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, won’t you join the 
dance? 

“‘You can really have no notion how delightful it will be 
When they take us up and throw us, with the lobsters, out to 
sea! ’ 

But the snail replied ‘Too far, too far ! ’ and gave a look 
askance — 

Said he thanked the whiting kindly, but Jhe would not join the 
dance. 

Would not, could not, would not, could not, would not join the 
dance. 

Would not, could not, would not, could not, could not join the 
dance. 

‘What matters it how far we go?’ his scaly friend replied, 
^‘There is another shore, you know, upon the other side. 

lie further off from England the nearer is to France; 

Then turn not pale, beloved snail, but come and join the dance. 

[ 130 ] 




IN WONDERLAND 


Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, will you join the 
dance? 

Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, won’t you join the 
dance ?”* 


“Thank you, it’s a very interesting dance to 
watch,” said Alice, feeling very glad that it 
was over at last; “and I do so like that curious 
song about the whiting!” 

“Oh, as to the whiting,” said the Mock Tur- 
tle, “they — you’ve seen them, of course?” 

“Yes,” said Alice, “I’ve often seen them at 
dinn ” she checked herself hastily. 

“I don’t know where Dinn may be,” said the 
Mock Turtle, “but if you’ve seen them so 
often, of course you know what they’re 


“I believe so,” Alice replied thoughtfully. 
“They have their tails in their mouths; and 
they’re all over crumbs.” 

“You’re wrong about the crumbs,” said the 
Mock Turtle: “crumbs would all wash off in 
the sea. But they have their tails in their 
mouths; and the reason is” — .here the Mock 
[ 131 ] 




ALICES ADVENTURES 

Turtle yawned and shut his eyes — “Tell her 
about the reason and all that,” he said to th< 
Gryphon. 

“The reason is,” said the Gryphon, “that 
they would go with the lobsters to the dance. 
So they got thrown out to sea. So they had 
to fall a long way. So they got their tails fast 
in their mouths. So they couldn’t get them 
out again. That’s all.” 

“Thank you,” said Alice, “it’s very inter- 
esting. I never knew so much about a whit- 
ing before.” 

“I can tell you more than that, if you like,” 
said the Gryphon. “Do you know why it’s 
called a whiting?” 

“I never thought about it,” said Alice. 
“Why?” 

“It does the boots and shoes ” the Gryphoi 
replied very solemnly. 

Alice was thoroughly puzzled. “Does the 
boots and shoes!” she repeated in a wonder- 
ing tone. 

“Why, what are your shoes done with?” said 
[ 132 ] 






IN WONDERLAND 

the Gryphon. “I mean, what makes them so 
shiny?” 

Alice looked down at them, and considered 
a little before she gave her answer. “They’re 
done with blacking, I believe.” 

“Boots and shoes under the sea,” the Gry- 
phon went on in a deep voice, “are done with 
whiting. Now you know.” 

“And what are they made of?” Alice asked 
in a tone of great curiosity. 

“Soles and eels, of course,” the Gryphon re- 
plied rather impatiently: “any shrimp could 
have told you that.” 

“If I’d been the whiting,” said Alice, whose 
thoughts were still running on the song, “I’ 
have said to the porpoise, ‘Keep back, please: 
we don’t want you with us!’ ” 

“They were obliged to have him with them,” 
the Mock Turtle said : “no wise fish would go 
anywhere without a porpoise.” 

“Wouldn’t it really?” said Alice in a tone of 
great surprise. 

“Of course not,” said the Mock Turtle; 

[ 133 ] 



ALICES ADVENTURES 

“why, if a fish came to me, and told me he was 
going on a journey, I should say ‘With what 
porpoise?’ ” 

“Don’t you mean ‘purpose?’ ” said Alice. 

“I mean what I say,” the Mock Turtle re- 
plied in an offended tone. And the Gryphon 
added, “Come, let’s hear some of your adven- 
tures.” 

“I could tell you my adventures — begin- 
ning from this morning,” said Alice a little 
timidly; but it’s no use going back to 
yesterday, because I was a different person 
then.” 

“Explain all that,” said the Mock Turtle. 

“No, no! the adventures first,” said the Gry- 
phon in an impatient tone: “explanations take 
such a dreadful time.” 

So Alice began telling them her adventures 
from the time when she first saw the White 
abbit; she was a little nervous about it just 
first, the two creatures got so close to her, 
ne on each side, and opened their eyes and 
mouths very wide, but she gained courage as 
[ 134 ] 




IN WONDERLAND 


she went on. Her listeners were perfectly 
quiet till she got to the part about her repeat- 
ing “You are old , Father William ” to the 
Caterpillar, and the words all coming 
different, and then the Mock Turtle drew 
a long breath, and said, “That’s very 
curious.” 

“It’s all about as curious as it can be,” said 
the Gryphon. 

“It all came different!” the Mock Turtle 
repeated thoughtfully. “I should like to hear 
her try and repeat something now. Tell her 
to begin.” He looked at the Gryphon as if 
he thought it had some kind of authority over 
Alice. 

“Stand up and repeat r J Tis the voice of the 
gard / " said the Gryphon. 

“How the creatures order one about, and 
make one repeat lessons!” thought Alice. 

“I might just as well be at school at once.” 
However, she got up, and began to repeat it, 
but her head was so full of the Lobster-Quad- 
rille, that she hardly knew what she was say- 
[ 135 ] 




ALICES ADVENTURES 


ing, and the words came very queer in- 
deed: 


“ ’Tis the voice of the lobster; I heard him declare, 
‘You have baked me too brown, I must sugar my hair. 
As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose 
Trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes.’ 


“That’s different from what I used to say 
when I was a child,” said the Gryphon. 

“Well, I never heard it before,” said the 
Mock Turtle; “but it sounds uncommon non- 
sense.” 

Alice said nothing; she had sat down again 
with her face in her hands, wandering if any- 
thing would ever happen in a natural way 
again. 

“I should like to have it explained,” said the 
Mock Turtle. 

“She can’t explain it,” said the Gryphon has^ 
tily. “Go on with the next verse.” 

“But about his toes?” the Mock Turtle per- 
sisted. 

“How could he turn them out with his nose, 
you know?” 

[ 136 ] 






IN WONDERLAND 


“It’s the first position in dancing,” Alice 
said; but she was dreadfully puzzled by the 
whole thing, and longed to change the sub- 
ject. 

“Go on with the next verse,” the Gryphon 
repeated impatiently; “it begins C I passed by 
his garden / " 

Alice did not dare to disobey, though she 
felt sure it would all come wrong, and she 
went on in a trembling voice : 

“I passed by his garden, and marked, with one eye. 

How the owl and the oyster were sharing the pie.” 

“What is the use of repeating all that stuff,” 
the Mock Turtle interrupted, “if you don’t ex- 
plain it as you go on? It’s by far the most 
confusing thing I ever heard.” 

“Yes, I think you’d better leave off,” said 
The Gryphon, and Alice was only too glad to 
do so. 

“Shall we try another figure of the Lobster- 
Quadrille ?” the Gryphon went on. “Or would 
you like the Mock Turtle to sing you a song?” 

“Oh, a song, please, if the Mock Turtle 
[ 137 ] 


•<? 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


would be so kind,” Alice replied, so eagerly 
that the Gryphon said, in a rather offended 
tone, “Hm!” No accounting for tastes! Sing 
her f Turtle soup / will you, old fellow?” 

The Mock Turtle sighed deeply, and began, 
in a voice sometimes choked with sobs, to sing 
this: 

“Beautiful Soup, so rich and green. 

Waiting in a hot tureen! 

Who for such dainties would not stoop? 

Soup of the evening, beautiful Soup! 

Soup of the evening, beautiful Soup! 

Beau — ootiful Soo — oop! 

Beau — ootiful Soo — oop! 

Soo — oop of the e — e — evening. 

Beautiful, beautiful Soup! 


“Beautiful Soup! Who cares for fish, 
Game, or any other dish? 

Who would not give all else for two p 
enny worth only of beautiful Soup? 
Pennyworth only of beautiful Soup? 
Beau — ootiful Soo — oop! 

Beau — ootiful Soo — oop! 

Soo — oop of the e — e — evening. 

Beautiful, beauti — FULSOUP!” 


“Chorus again,” cried the Gryphon, and the 


Wyt (Srppfjon onlp anstoereb 
‘‘Come on” anb ran tfje faster. 



Page jjq 







IN WONDERLAND 


Mock Turtle had just begun to repeat it, when 
a cry of “The trial’s beginning,” was heard in 
the distance. 

“Come on,” cried the Gryphon, and, taking 
Alice by the hand, it hurried off, without wait- 
ing for the end of the song. 

“What trial is it?” Alice panted as she ran, 
but the Gryphon only answered “Come on,” 
and ran the faster, while more and more faint- 
ly came, carried on the breeze that followed, 
the melancholy words: 


“Soo — oop of the e — e — evening. 
Beautiful, beautiful Soup!’* 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


WHO STOLE THE TARTS? 

HE King and Queen of Hearts were 
seated on their throne when they ar- 
rived, with a great crowd assembled 
about them — all sorts of little birds and 
beasts, as well as the whole pack of cards; 
the Knave was standing before them, in 
chains, with a soldier on each side to guard 
him ; and near the King was the White Rabbit, 
with a trumpet in one hand, and a scroll of 
parchment in the other. In the very middle of 
the court was a table, with a large dish of tarts 
upon it: they looked so good, that it made 
Alice quite hungry to look at them — “I wish 
d get the trial done,” she thought, “and 
round the refreshments.” But there 
seemed to be no chance of this, so she began 
[ 140 ] 



















* 










% 




*- * 


f 















\ 











































* 


1 


•* 
















looking at everything about her to pass away 
the time. 

Alice had never been in a court of justice 
before, but she had read about them in books, 
and she was quite pleased to find that she knew 
the name of nearly everything there. “That’s 
the judge,” she said to herself, “because of his 
great wig.” 

The judge, by the way, was the King, and 
as he wore his crown over the wig (look at the 
picture if you want to see how he did it), 
he did not look at all comfortable, and it was 
certainly not becoming. 

“And that’s the jury-box,” thought Alice, 
“and those twelve creatures” (she was obliged 
to say “creatures,” you see, because some of 
them were animals, and some were birds), “I 
suppose they are the jurors.” She said this 
last word two or three times over to herself, 
begin rather proud of it: for she thought, and 
rightly too, that very few little girls of her 
age knew the meaning of it at all. However, 
“jurymen” would have done just as well. 




ALICES ADVENTURES 


The twelve jurors were all writing very 
busily on slates. “What are they doing?” 
Alice whispered to the Gryphon. “They can’t 
have anything to put down yet, before the 
trial’s begun.” 

“They’re putting down their names,” the 
Gryphon whispered in reply, “for fear they 
should forget them before the end of the 
trial.” 

“Stupid things!” Alice began in a loud in- 
dignant voice, but she stopped hastily, for the 
White Rabbit cried out, “Silence in the court!” 
and the King put on his spectacles and looked 
anxiously round, to make out who was talk- 
ing. 

Alice could see, as well as if she were look- 
ing over their shoulders, that all the jurors 
were writing down “stupid things!” on their t 
slates, and she could even make out that one 
.of them didn’t know how to spell “stupid,” and 
that he had to ask his neighbor to tell him. “A 
tnice muddle their slates’ll be in before the 
trial’s over!” thought Alice. 

[ 142 ] 




One of the jurors had a pencil that 
squeaked. This, of course, Alice could not 
stand, and she went round the court and got 
behind him, and very soon found an opportu- 
nity of taking it away. She did it so quickly 
that the poor little juror (it was Bill, the Liz- 
ard) could not make out at all what had be- 
come of it; so, after hunting all about for it, 
he was obliged to write with one finger for the 
rest of the day ; and this was of very little use, 
as it left no mark on the slate. 

“Herald, read the accusation !” said the 
King. 

On this the White Rabbit blew three blasts 
on the trumpet, and then unrolled the parch- 
ment scroll, and read as follows : 

“The Queen of Hearts, she made some tarts. 

All on a summer day : 

The Knave of Hearts, he stole those tarts. 

And took them quite away! ” 

“Consider your verdict,” the King said to 
the jury. 

“Not yet, not yet!” the Rabbit hastily in- 
[ 143 ] 








ALICES ADVENTURES 

terrupted. “There’s a great deal to come be- 
fore that!” 

“Call the first witness,” said the King; 
and the White Rabbit blew three blasts 
on the trumpet, and called out, “First 
witness!” 

The first witness was the Hatter. He came 
in with a teacup in one hand, and a piece of 
bread-and-butter in the other. “I beg pardon, 
your majesty,” he began, “for bringing these 
in: but I hadn’t quite finished my tea when I 
was sent for.” 

“You ought to have finished,” said the King. 
“When did you begin?” 

The Hatter looked at the March Hare, who 
had followed him into the court, arm-in-arm 
with the Dormouse. “Fourteenth of March, I 
think it was,” he said. 

“Fifteenth,” said the March Hare. 

“Sixteenth,” added the Dormouse. 

“Write that down,” the King said to the 
ury, and the jury eagerly wrote down all 
three dates on their slates, and then added 
[ 144 ] 






























IN WONDERLAND 


them up, and reduced the answer to shillings 
and pence. 

“Take off your hat,” the king said to the 
TIatter. 

“It isn’t mine,” said the Hatter. 

“Stolen!” the King exclaimed, turning to 
the jury, who instantly made a memorandum 
of the fact. 

“I keep them to sell,” the Hatter added as 
an explanation: “I’ve none of my own. I’m 
a hatter.” 

Here the Queen put on her spectacles, and 
began staring hard at the Hatter, who turned 
pale and fidgeted. 

“Give your evidence,” said the King; “and 
don’t be nervous, or I’ll have you executed on 
the spot.” 

This did not seem to encourage the witness 
at all; he kept shifting from one foot to the 
other, looking uneasily at the Queen, and in 
his confusion he bit a large piece out of his 
teacup instead of the bread and butter. 

Just at this moment Alice felt a very curious 

[ 145 1 



ALICES ADVENTURES 



sensation, which puzzled her a good deal until 
she made out what it was: she was beginning 
to grow larger again, and she thought at first 
she would get up and leave the court; but on 
second thoughts she decided to remain where 
she was as long as there was room for her. 

“I wish you wouldn’t squeeze so,” said the 
Dormouse, who was sitting next to her. “I 
can hardly breathe.” 

“I can’t help it,” said Alice very meekly: 
“I’m growing.” 

“You’ve no right to grow here ” said the 
Dormouse. 

“Don’t talk nonsense,” said Alice more bold- 
ly: “y° u know you’re growing too.” 

“Yes, but I grow at a reasonable pace,” said 
the Dormouse: “not in that ridiculous fashion.’' 
And he got up very sulkily and crossed over^ 
to the other side of the court. 

All this time the Queen had never left off 
staring at the Hatter, and, just as the Dor- 
mouse crossed the court, she said to one of 
the officers of the court, “Bring me the list of 
[ 146 ] 




4 



IN WONDERLAND 


singers in the last concert!” on which the 
wretched Hatter trembled so, that he shook 
both his shoes off. 

“Give your evidence,” the King repeated 
angrily, “or I’ll have you executed, whether 
you’re nervous or not.” 

“I’m a poor man, your majesty,” the Hat- 
ter began in a trembling voice, “and I hadn’t 
but just begun my tea — not above a week or 
so — and what with the bread-and-butter get- 
ting so thin — and the twinkling of the 
tea ” 

“The twinkling of what?” said the King. 

“It began with the tea,” the Hatter replied. 

“Of course twinkling begins with a T!” said 
the King sharply. “Do you take me for a 
dunce? Goon!” 

“I’m a poor man,” the Hatter went on, “and 
most things twinkled after that — only the 
March Hare said ” 

“I didn’t!” the March Hare interrupted in 
a great hurry. 

“You did!” said the Hatter. 

[ 147 ] 





ALICES ADVENTURES 


“I deny it,” said the March Hare. 

“He denies it,” said the King: “leave out 
that part.” 

“Well, at any rate, the Dormouse said — — ” 
the Hatter went on, looking anxiously round 
to see if he would deny it too: but the Dor- 
mouse denied nothing, being fast asleep. 

“After that,” continued the Hatter, “I cut 
some more bread and butter ” 

“But what did the Dormouse say?” one of 
the jury asked. 

“That I can’t remember,” said the Hatter. 

“You must remember,” remarked the King, 
“or I’ll have you executed.” 

The miserable Hatter dropped his teacup 
and bread and butter, and went down on one 
knee. “I’m a poor man, your majesty,” he' 
began. 

“You’re a very poor speaker /’ said the 
King. 

Here one of the guinea-pigs cheered, and 
l was immediately suppressed by the officers of 
the court. (As that is rather a hard word, I 
[ 148 ] 




r«r 




will just explain to you how it was done. They 
had a large canvas bag, which ties up at the 
mouth with strings: into this they slipped the 
guinea pig, head first, and then sat upon it. ) 

“I’m glad I’ve seen that done,” thought 
Alice. “I’ve so often read in the newspapers, 
at the end of trials, ‘There was some attempt 
at applause, which was immediately suppressed 
by the officers of the court,’ and I never under- 
stood what it meant till now.” 

“If that’s all you know about it, you may 
stand down,” continued the King. 

“I can’t go no lower,” said the Hatter: “I’m 
on the floor, as it is.” 

“Then you may sit down,” the King re- 
plied. 

Here the other guinea-pig cheered, and was 
suppressed. 

“Come, that finishes the guinea-pigs !” 
thought Alice. “Now we shall get on better.” 

“I’d rather finish my tea,” said the Hatter, 
with an anxious look at the Queen, who was 
reading the list of singers. 

[ 149 ] ♦ 






ALICES ADVENTURES 

You may go,” said the King, and the Hat-/ 
ter hurriedly left the court, without even wait 4 
ing to put his shoes on. \ 

‘‘And just take his head off outside,” the 
Queen added to one of the officers; but the 
Hatter was out of sight before the officer could 
get to the door. 

“Call the next witness!” said the King. 

The next witness was the Duchess’ cook. She| 
carried the pepper-box in her hand ; and Alice 
guessed who it was, even before she got into 
the court, by the way the people near the door 
began sneezing all at once. 

“Give your evidence,” said the King. 

“Shan’t,” said the cook. 

The King looked anxiously at the White^ 
Rabbit, who said in a low voice, “Your majesty 
must cross-examine this witness.” 

“Well, if I must,” the King said with a 
melancholy air, and, after folding his arms and 
frowning at the cook till his eyes were nearly 
out of sight, he said in a deep voice, “What are 
the tarts made of?” 

[ 150 ] 




IN WONDERLAND 


“Pepper, mostly,” said the cook. 

“Treacle,” said a sleepy voice behind her. 

“Collar that Dormouse!” the Queen shrieked 
out. “Behead that Dormouse! Turn that 
Dormouse out of the court! Suppress him! 
Pinch him ! Off with his whiskers !” 

For some minutes the whole court was in 
confusion, getting the Dormouse turned out, 
and, by the time they had settled down again, 
the cook had disappeared. 

“Never mind!” said the King, with an air of 
great relief. “Call the next witness.” And 
he added in an undertone to the Queen, “Real- 
ly, my dear, you must cross-examine the next 
witness. It quite makes my forehead ache!” 

Alice watched the White Rabbit as he fum- 
bled over the list, feeling very curious to see 
what the next witness would be like — “for they 
haven’t got much evidence yet ” she said to 
herself. Imagine her surprise, when the 
White Rabbit read out, at the top of his shrill 
little voice, the name “Alice!” 




ERE!” cried Alice, quite forget- 
ting in the flurry of the moment 
how large she had grown 
in the last few minutes, and she jumped up in 
such a hurry that she tipped over the jury-box 
with the edge of her skirt, upsetting all the 
jurymen on to the heads of the crowd below, 
and there they lay sprawling about, reminding 
her very much of a globe of gold-fish she had 
accidentally upset the week before. 

“Oh, I beg your pardon!” she exclaimed in 
a tone of great dismay, and began picking 
them up again as quickly as she could, for the, 
accident of the gold-fish kept running in her 
and she had a vague sort of idea that they 
Lust be collected at once and put back into the 
ury-box, or they would die. 

“The trial cannot proceed,” said the King in 
[ 152 ] 








back in their proper places — all ” he repeated 
with great emphasis, looking hard at Alice as 
he did so. 

Alice looked at the jury-box, and saw that, 
in her haste, she had put the Lizard in head 
downwards, and the poor little thing was wav- 
ing its tail about in a melancholy way, being 
quite unable to move. She soon got it out 
again, and put it right; “not that it signifies 
much,” she said to herself; “I should think it 
would be quite as much used in the trial one 
way up as the other.” 

As soon as the jury had a little recovered 
from the shock of being upset, and their slates 
and pencils had been found and handed back 
to them, they set to work very diligently to 
’te out a history of the accident, all except 
the Lizard, who seemed too much overcome to 
do anything but sit with its mouth wide open, 
gazing up into the roof of the court. 

“What do you know about this business?” 
the King said to Alice. 

[ 153 ] 




ALICES ADVENTURES 


“Nothing,” said Alice. 

“Nothing whatever V s persisted the King. 

“Nothing whatever,” said Alice. 

“That’s very important,” the King said, 
turning to the jury. They were just begin- 
ning to write this down on their slates, when 
the White Rabbit interrupted; “[/^important, 
your majesty means, of course,” he said in a 
very respectful tone, but frowning and mak- 
ing faces at him as he spoke. 

“[/^important, of course, I meant,” the 
King hastily said, and went on to himself in 
an undertone, “important — unimportant — un- 
important — important ” as if he were try- 

ing which word sounded best. 

Some of the jury wrote it down “impor- 
tant,” and some of them “unimportant.” Alice( 
could see this, as she was near enough to look 
over their slates; “but it doesn’t matter a bit,”" 
she thought to herself. 

At this moment the King, who had been for 
[some time busily writing in his note-book, 
called out “Silence!” and read out from his 
[ 154 ] 



IN WONDERLAND 




book, “Rule Forty-two. All 'persons more 
than a mile high to leave the court ” 

Everybody looked at Alice. 

“Fm not a mile high,” said Alice. 

“You are,” said the King. 

“Nearly two miles high,” added the 
Queen. 

“Well, I shan’t go, at any rate,” said Alice; 
“besides, that’s not a regular rule; you invent- 
ed it just now.” 

“It’s the oldest rule in the book,” said the 
King. 

“Then it ought to be Number One,” said 
Alice. 

The king turned pale, and shut his note- 
book hastily. “Consider your verdict,” he said 
to the jury, in a low trembling voice. 

“There’s more evidence to come yet, please 
your majesty,” said the White Rabbit, jump- 
ing up in a great hurry; “this paper has just 
been picked up.” 

“What’s in it?” said the Queen. 

“I haven’t opened it yet,” said the White 
[ 155 ] 



ALICES ADVENTURES 


Rabbit, “but it seems to be a letter, written by 
the prisoner to — to somebody.” 

“It must have been that,” said the King, 
“unless it was written to nobody, which isn’t 
usual, you know.” 

“Who is it directed to?” said one of the jury- 
men. 

“It isn’t directed at all,” said the White 
Rabbit; “in fact, there nothing written on the 
outside ” He unfolded the paper as he spoke, 
and added: “It isn’t a letter after all; it’s a 
set of verses.” 

“Are they in the prisoner’s handwriting?” 
asked another of the jurymen. 

“No, they’re not,” said the White Rabbit, 
“and that’s the queerest thing about it.” (The 
jury all looked puzzled.) 

“He must have imitated somebody else’s 
I hand,” said the King. (The jury all bright- 
y ened up again. ) 

“Please your majesty,” said the Knave, “I 
Ididn’t write it, and they can’t prove I did: 
there’s no name signed at the end.” 

[ ^*3 ] 










































































































































































































































































































4 











































































































































































mX 


' K <r‘ ' 'j . . j 


“W&tytxt sfjall 3 tiegtn, 
please pour majestp?” 


Page 157 





“If you didn’t sign it,” said the King, “that 
only makes the matter worse. You must have 
meant some mischief, or else you’d have signed 
your name like an honest man.” 

There was a general clapping of hands at 
this: it was the first really clever thing the 
King had said that day. 

“That proves his guilt,” said the Queen. 

“It proves nothing of the sort,” said Alice. 
“Why you don’t even know what they’re 
about!” 

“Read them,” said the King. 

The White Rabbit put on his spectacles. 
“Where shall I begin, please your majesty?” 
he asked. 

“Begin at the beginning,” the King said, 
gravely, “and go on till you come to the end: 
then stop.” 

These were the verses the White Rabbit 
read: 

“They told me that you had been to her, 

And mentioned me to him: 

She gave me a good character, 

But said I could not swim. 









•J 



ALICES ADVEMURES 


He sent them word I had not gone 
(We know it to be true): 

If she should push the matter on. 
What would become of you? 


I gave him one, they gave him two, 
You gave us three or more; 

They all returned from him to you, 
Though they were mine before. 


If I or she should chance to be 
Involved in this affair, 

He trusts to you to set them free, 
Exactly as we were. 


My notion was that you had been 
(Before she had this fit) 

An Obstacle that came between 
Him, and ourselves and it. 


Don’t let him know she liked them best, 
For this must ever be 
A secret, kept from all the rest, 

Between yourself and me.” 


“That’s the most important piece of evidence 
we’ve heard yet,” said the King, rubbing his 

hands; “so now let the jury ” 

i “If any one of them can explain it,” said 
Alice (she had grown so large in the last few 

[ 158 ] 




IN WONDERLAND 

minutes that she wasn’t a bit afraid of inter- 
rupting him) , “I’ll give him sixpence. I don’t 
believe there’s an atom of meaning in it.” 

The jury all wrote down on their slates, 
“She doesn’t believe there’s an atom of mean- 
ing in it,” but none of them attempted to ex- 
plain the paper. 

“If there’s no meaning in it,” said the King, 
“that saves a world of trouble, you know, as 
we needn’t try to find any. And yet I don’t 
know,” he went on, spreading out the verses 
on his knee, and looking at them with one eye ; 
“I seem to see some meaning in them, after 
all — f said I could not swim ’ — you can’t 
swim, can you?” he added, turning to the 
Knave. 

The Knave shook his head sadly. “Do I 
look like it?” he said. (Which he certainly did 
not , being made entirely of cardboard.) 

“All right, so far,” said the King, and he 
went on muttering over the verses to himself : 
" f We know it to he true ’ — that’s the jury, of 
course — ‘I gave her one , they gave him two ’ — 
[ 159 ] 




ALICES ADVENTURES 


why, that must be what he did with the tarts, 
you know ” 

“But it goes on r they all returned from him 
to you / ” said Alice. 

“Why, there they are!” said the King tri- 
umphantly, pointing to the tarts on the table. 
“Nothing can be clearer than that . Then again 
' before she had this fit * — you never had fits, 
my dear, I think?” he said to the Queen. 

“Never!” said the Queen furiously, throw- 
ing an inkstand at the Lizard as she spoke. 
(The unfortunate Bill had left off writing on 
his slate with one finger, as he found it made 
no mark; but he now hastily began again, 
using the ink that was trickling down his face, 
as long as it lasted.) 

“Then the words don’t fit you,” said the 
King, looking round the court with a 
There was a dead silence. 

It’s a pun,” the King added in an angry 
tone, and everybody laughed. “Let the jury 
their verdict,” the King said, for 
about the twentieth time that day. 

[ 160 ] 





IN WONDERLAND 


“No, no!” said the Queen. “Sentence first 
— verdict afterward.” 

“Stuff and nonsense!” said Alice loudly. 
“The idea of having the sentence first!” 

“Hold your tongue!” said the Queen, turn- 
ing purple. 

“I won’t!” said Alice. 

“Off with her head!” the Queen shouted at 
the top of her voice. Nobody moved. 

“Who cares for you?” said Alice (she had 
grown to her full size by this time) . “You’re 
nothing but a pack of cards!” 

At this the whole pack rose up into the air, 
and came flying down upon her; she gave a 
little scream, half of fright and half of anger 
and tried to beat them off, and found herself 
, lying on the bank, with her head in the lap 
of her sister, who was gently brushing away 
some dead leaves that had fluttered down from 
the trees on to her face. 

“Wake up, Alice dear!” said her sister; 
“why, what a long sleep you’ve had!” 

“Oh, I’ve had such a curious dream!” said 

[ 161 ] 




ALICES ADVENTURES 


Alice, and she told her sister, as well as she 
could remember them, all these strange ad- 
ventures of hers that you have just been read- 
ing about; and when she had finished, her sis- 
ter kissed her, and said, “It was a curious 
dream, dear, certainly; but now run into your 
tea; it’s getting late.” So Alice got up and 
ran off, thinking while she ran, as well she 
might, what a wonderful dream it had been. 

But her sister sat still just as she left her, 
leaning her head on her hand, watching the 
setting sun, and thinking of little Alice and 
all her wonderful adventures, till she too be- 
gan dreaming after a fashion, and this was her 
dream: 

First, she dreamed of little Alice herself: 
once again the tiny hands were clasped upon 
her knee, and the bright eager eyes were look- 
ing up into hers — she could hear the very tones 
,of her voice, and see that queer little toss of 
her head, to keep back the wandering hair that 
kvould always get into her eyes — and still as 
she listened, or seemed to listen, the whole 
[ 162 ] 





place around her became alive with the strange 
creatures of her little sister’s dream. 

The long grass rustled at her feet as the 
White Rabbit hurried by — the frightened 
Mouse splashed his way through the neighbor- 
ing pool — she could hear the rattle of the tea- 
cups as the March Hare and his friends shared 
their never-ending meal, and the shrill voice of 
the Queen ordering off her unfortunate guests 
to execution — once more the pig-baby was 
sneezing on the Duchess’ knee, while plates 
and dishes crashed around it — once more the 
shriek of the Gryphon, the squeaking of the 
Lizard’s slate-pencil, and the choking of the 
suppressed guinea-pigs, filled the air, mixed 
up with the distant sob of the miserable Mock 

So she sat on, with closed eyes, and half be- 
lieved herself in Wonderland, though she 
had but to open them again and all would 
change to dull reality — the grass would be only 
rustling in the wind, and the pool rippling to 
the waving of the reeds — the rattling teacups 
[ 163 ] 






ALICES ADVENTURES 


would change to tinkling sheep-bells, and the 
Queen’s shrill cries to the voice of the shepherd , 
boy — and the sneeze of the baby, the shriek 
of the Gryphon, and all the other queer noises, 
would change (she knew) to the confused 
clamor of the busy farm-yard — while the low- 
ing of the cattle in the distance would take the 
place of the Mock Turtle’s heavy sobs 

Lastly, she pictured to herself how this same 
little sister of hers would, in the after- time, be 
herself a grown woman; and how she would 
keep, through all her riper years, the simple 
and loving heart of her childhood: and how 
she would gather about her other little chil- 
dren, and make their eyes bright and eager 
with many a strange tale, perhaps even with , 
the dream of Wonderland of long-ago: and 
how she would feel with all their simple sor-q 
rows, and find a pleasure in all their simple 
joys, remembering her own child-life and the 
happy summer days. 


[ 164 ] 











c 73 89 

— A 


fir ^ 











































% 



